The best place to find support from people "who understand this fucking disease and how it consumes you" is an AA meeting.

http://www.aa.org/pages/en_US/find-local-aa

It's Saturday morning, plenty of time the find and make plans to attend a meeting tonight.

If you don't like AA there are other groups that can be of help. I found DS (Daily Strength) the best for me. I hate face to face meetings that spend so much time on one person, and I don't like the religious nature of AA. I made friends, with newcomers here on DS . We shared our journals, emailed each other.

Making friends in sobriety was a slow process for me. As my mind woke up, I stated doing things that I always dreamed about, but never had the energy to do, because if my drinking. As I got involved in these activities I made friends. Now I have friends, who ether do not drink or are social drinkers. I did not seek out nondrinkers. It just happened. I am very happy today with my circle of friends.

You need to give it time.

Life is difficult in the beginning of sobriety. I had many relapses until I realize that I cannot run away from my unpleasant emotions. I faced them. At first, I could not understand how a normal person could get through these emotions, without drinking or using. However, each time I faced them, rather than escaping, they became less powerful. Eventually they were no longer overpowering.

Imp is right, there are a lot of options.

My experience with AA is very far from his. I haven't found to be religious or cult regardless of the doctrine in which it is built.

I learned that others had the same feeling you have, which is exactly what I have. Now it's a great place with a lot of great people for me. I don't go every day. I maybe go once a week but know I have lots of support 24/7 if I ever needed it. And I don't ever think about drinking.

I remember sitting in the parking lot, too afraid to go through the door with the sign on it that said "AA meeting inside". Then I would go home and tell my wife that I went to the meeting which was only half right. Week after week, I did the same until one day, I dared myself to go through the door. Some guy shook my hand and welcomed me at the door. I found a seat in the back. People came over to me and introduced themselves to me. I could see that they were all very friendly, very helpful and very caring people. Some gave me their phone numbers and told me to call them anytime. The meeting started and the chairman shared his story of sobriety. I saw myself up in that chair because I had the same exact story! I couldn't believe it! After the meeting a man and a woman came over to me and introduced themselves to me and both offered to sponser me but the man, his name was Bill, became my first AA sponser. I kept in phone contact daily with Bill. If I had a problem, he knew how to help. If I felt triggered, he knew what to say. He had 5 years sobriety and his own sponsor was his doctor.

It felt good to be around others who had been in my shoes and knew exactly what I was going through and how to deal with it. I don't think I could have stayed sober for so long if I did not have them in my life. AA was the best thing that ever happened to me!

God Bless

I know that I could not quit alcohol on my own.I was so desperate that I went to an ER to be admitted for detox.From there,I was taken by ambulance to a facility specifically to detox.After 72 hours of detox,the cravings were gone.I remained in that facility for a total of 6 days(Sat.-Thurs.)but when I left I KNEW that I would never drink again I just needed to get through the craving/withdrawals safely.I've been sober since April 29th,2017. If you can,go through a detox program and then follow up with AA.Good luck.I promise you that if you do this,life will get better:)

Oh how I understand your post. I know I have people who I spend time with who will not be the best choice I can make. It's incredibly hard to admit that I have to give up people I care for. I also have met so many people in AA that I admire. Never give up trying. You are worth it and you can have peace and joy.