Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Getting better and I didn't even know it.
Friday, June 22, 2012 | A Positive story
My name is Holly and I have been battling alcohol for a little over 10 years. The majority of my life has been spent working temporary jobs just long enough to pick up my guitar and do gigs as much as possible with whatever band I was in. The other part of my life has been spent feeding my addiction of alcohol, and doing everything from selling one of my guitars to get drunk on New Years' Eve, to giving up a place to stay so that I could live at the bar. And yes, I said LIVE.
I am 26 years old now and I have been drinking since I was 13. Technically, cocaine was the first drug that I tried, but this support group is not for cocaine so I will try to stay on the subject. I met an older boy at a very young age that was destructive, addictive, and in every word of the sense a criminal. Anxious to try anything, I jumped at the opportunity to experience something new and different.
For a few years I could take or leave alcohol. I could drink all night long at a party or go strong for days at a time and come back to my parents house and eat all day long without even wanting a drink. But after I graduated high school, I moved out into an apartment and was up to a 12 pack a night. My best friend at the time knew a guy who was a few years older than us and he would party constantly, especially at our apartment so we gave him money and he bought us whatever beer we said.
About a year goes by and I'm still at a 12 pack, so I'm thinking, "Ok, I know that I need a drink every night, but I'm still going to work and as long as it doesn't conflict with me coming into work, it's no big deal, right?" WRONG.
So the lease is up and we move into this HUGE house that is caddy corner from a bar. ( go figure). A few months go by and I lose my job, so, desperate for paying bills and supplying alcohol for myself and my boyfriend, I work these horrible paid-today side jobs with 14 other men whistling at every body part I had for about 8 hours. So days and days go by until finally, we get evicted due to half of us only being able to pay rent, and I move back into my parents again.
Up until this point I was making a little extra money on the side with the band, but not enough for me to live on my own. Finally I hit 21 and OH MY GOD!. I'm sure we all know how that is, but by the time I had hit 21 I was up to about a case a day of alcohol by myself and of course, it just got worse after I got legal. The thing is is that I am a very talented musician and can play just about any song you could give me, ( if you could give me time,) but all I wanted to do was go to the bar. At first I thought that it was the rush of meeting new people and having conversations with intellectual, awesome people, ya know? But one day I was sitting with a man for a few minutes, talking and what not and he asked me why I was drinking so much and I didn't understand what he said until he told me I had about 5 tonics in 15 minutes!
A about a year later I left the band and lost my house. I drank at the bar every day from 5:30 am til 1 in the morning every night for about 6 months and slept on a playground. Since then I have fallen in and out of having no home, no job, and no place to stay. But this IS positive and I have drastically improved in the last month or so. I find that I don't drink as often as long as I have something to do and since I love to play, I just pick up my guitar. If you don't like music, my advice would be to find a hobby or something to be passionate about and it will do wonders for your life.
I wish all of you the best of recovery and I am looking forward to speaking with you in the support group.
Hugs and hopes that you are all doing well.
Holly D.
Friday, June 22, 2012 | A Positive story
My name is Holly and I have been battling alcohol for a little over 10 years. The majority of my life has been spent working temporary jobs just long enough to pick up my guitar and do gigs as much as possible with whatever band I was in. The other part of my life has been spent feeding my addiction of alcohol, and doing everything from selling one of my guitars to get drunk on New Years' Eve, to giving up a place to stay so that I could live at the bar. And yes, I said LIVE.
I am 26 years old now and I have been drinking since I was 13. Technically, cocaine was the first drug that I tried, but this support group is not for cocaine so I will try to stay on the subject. I met an older boy at a very young age that was destructive, addictive, and in every word of the sense a criminal. Anxious to try anything, I jumped at the opportunity to experience something new and different.
For a few years I could take or leave alcohol. I could drink all night long at a party or go strong for days at a time and come back to my parents house and eat all day long without even wanting a drink. But after I graduated high school, I moved out into an apartment and was up to a 12 pack a night. My best friend at the time knew a guy who was a few years older than us and he would party constantly, especially at our apartment so we gave him money and he bought us whatever beer we said.
About a year goes by and I'm still at a 12 pack, so I'm thinking, "Ok, I know that I need a drink every night, but I'm still going to work and as long as it doesn't conflict with me coming into work, it's no big deal, right?" WRONG.
So the lease is up and we move into this HUGE house that is caddy corner from a bar. ( go figure). A few months go by and I lose my job, so, desperate for paying bills and supplying alcohol for myself and my boyfriend, I work these horrible paid-today side jobs with 14 other men whistling at every body part I had for about 8 hours. So days and days go by until finally, we get evicted due to half of us only being able to pay rent, and I move back into my parents again.
Up until this point I was making a little extra money on the side with the band, but not enough for me to live on my own. Finally I hit 21 and OH MY GOD!. I'm sure we all know how that is, but by the time I had hit 21 I was up to about a case a day of alcohol by myself and of course, it just got worse after I got legal. The thing is is that I am a very talented musician and can play just about any song you could give me, ( if you could give me time,) but all I wanted to do was go to the bar. At first I thought that it was the rush of meeting new people and having conversations with intellectual, awesome people, ya know? But one day I was sitting with a man for a few minutes, talking and what not and he asked me why I was drinking so much and I didn't understand what he said until he told me I had about 5 tonics in 15 minutes!
A about a year later I left the band and lost my house. I drank at the bar every day from 5:30 am til 1 in the morning every night for about 6 months and slept on a playground. Since then I have fallen in and out of having no home, no job, and no place to stay. But this IS positive and I have drastically improved in the last month or so. I find that I don't drink as often as long as I have something to do and since I love to play, I just pick up my guitar. If you don't like music, my advice would be to find a hobby or something to be passionate about and it will do wonders for your life.
I wish all of you the best of recovery and I am looking forward to speaking with you in the support group.
Hugs and hopes that you are all doing well.
Holly D.
No offense but it doesn't sound like you are battling alcohol at all. Sounds to me like you give it everything it wants.
It's a shame to hear this sort of thing. You could get some help and stop wasting you life and talent. Booze can do nothing but harm you. I didn't get sober until 35 and my biggest regret is how many years I spent sick and not even knowing it. From 22-35, my life is just a blur of depression, anxiety, and hopelessness. It could have been so different. I had my talents too and eventually it all dwindled until my next drink was the only thing that mattered.
I hope you find the desire to get sober for good. Its actually a better life than being a part time drink in my opinion.
Just keep trying.
It was such a relief to me when I realized that when I decided to quit I did not have to worry about it anymore. The decision was made so I did not have to worry about whether I could have a drink (or another or another) or whether I had to much. I still had cravings to deal with, but the decision about whether I could have a drink or how much? That stress was gone. Over.
Sounds like you have a gift of music. Why not let that grow and flourish without the numbness and false sense of reality that drinking brings?
Sorry its not going to happen your fooling yourself.
I would suggest getting educated on the disease and see if what your trying to accomplish will work for ya.
Wish ya the best.