Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Ok so here's the deal...
When I used to drink early in my marriage my wife didn't know about it. I was pretty good at hiding it. One time she caught me but I blamed it on the football game I was watching and she let it go.
Now, six years into our marriage, she has caught me on at least a few occasions. She is always mad about it and has threatened to leave me if I don't figure it out. She has never been supportive, even though I have reached out to her on two seperate occasions for help and she has scoffed at the idea of any kind of therapy. She knows my Dad is an alcoholic and that my Mom stayed by him all those years and my wife has said she will never be like my mother.
So yesterday my wife and her sister decided to take the kids for a walk to the park. The park is 15 minutes walk away. After they left, of course I did what any alky would do. I got in my car and drove to the store to get my fix. I came home and was drinking in front of the computer while also watching the NBA playoffs. I figured I had at least a 2 hour time window but about an hour in I heard the gate open and I ran to the room to hide my beer. She had run home to get some money because they found something at a garage sale. I didn't like my original hiding spot for my beer so I snuck in and moved it. She commented to me "Why are you hiding it? I know." I played it off and she left.
When she came home later she was not mad at me and acting like everything was fine.
This worries me. She always used to get mad at me for drinking but now she was acting like she could care less.
It didn't worry me enough to stop drinking since I had more today.
When I used to drink early in my marriage my wife didn't know about it. I was pretty good at hiding it. One time she caught me but I blamed it on the football game I was watching and she let it go.
Now, six years into our marriage, she has caught me on at least a few occasions. She is always mad about it and has threatened to leave me if I don't figure it out. She has never been supportive, even though I have reached out to her on two seperate occasions for help and she has scoffed at the idea of any kind of therapy. She knows my Dad is an alcoholic and that my Mom stayed by him all those years and my wife has said she will never be like my mother.
So yesterday my wife and her sister decided to take the kids for a walk to the park. The park is 15 minutes walk away. After they left, of course I did what any alky would do. I got in my car and drove to the store to get my fix. I came home and was drinking in front of the computer while also watching the NBA playoffs. I figured I had at least a 2 hour time window but about an hour in I heard the gate open and I ran to the room to hide my beer. She had run home to get some money because they found something at a garage sale. I didn't like my original hiding spot for my beer so I snuck in and moved it. She commented to me "Why are you hiding it? I know." I played it off and she left.
When she came home later she was not mad at me and acting like everything was fine.
This worries me. She always used to get mad at me for drinking but now she was acting like she could care less.
It didn't worry me enough to stop drinking since I had more today.
For me, I realized that alcohol was a big part of my reward system - if I worked a long day, I *deserved* a few drinks. I have since replaced that with other leisure activities that are meaningful and creative. It takes some thought and effort, but is worth it. You CAN do it.
sorry just wanted you to see it from the other side. I wish you well, save your family, you might have a chance .
After dinner I went to the gym for an hour and didn't stop at any store for a drink.
I was more helpful around the house than I have been in a long time.
I went to bed around 10 and had a good night's sleep since today I am off work.
Here goes day 2.
Excellent first night. And as they say on the bottle of shampoo: "repeat as necessary" :)
For as long as I could.
You might just take that lack of anger of hers and be a little worried because maybe she's just giving up.
It's NOT that women don't stand by or help their man.
It's that women (AND men) realize that there's NOTHING they can do and move on. :(
It's not even that we WANT to.
It's because we HAVE to.
Don't ask HER to get you help.
Get it for yourself.
It's all up to YOU.
Mine was a 25 year relationship and it almost killed me (and hurts DAILY) that my X left me no choice but to leave.
Don't let her make the choice to leave.
Make it YOUR choice to get help before it's too late!
(I am a recovering alcoholic so it's not like I don't have a CLUE on what you're going through.)
lolo