Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
I'm new to this site. I found it this morning in my desperate attempt to reach out to someone for help or advice. My AH and I have been married for 11 years this month. The whole time has been turbulent. We thank God that we are still together after surviving adultery and his war experience. However, his drinking has been a struggle. For years he would deny he had a problem and that he could stop at any time. Then a few years back he admitted it was a problem. Today, he still continues the same trend: a "fifth" or sometimes more a day. I don't think he understands how bad he is because he is a functioning alcoholic. I'm so tired of this. Every time I bring it up to him he says I'm judging him. Or I don't understand his war experience. That was almost ten years ago. I've defended him from our parents but I've also been attacked by him (not physically). I'm just so tired of the mind games. I honestly want to leave. My kids don't deserve to have a drink father. But I also want to help him. There's so much more to the story I just don't have the energy to write it. Any advice and prayers would be appreciated.
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
Sorry to hear that things are so bad for you and your family.
Unfortunately, nobody learns at school how to deal with a problem like this and many people struggle alone, trying to make the best of a bad situation. In doing this, the spouse or partner of an alcoholic can actually make matters worse through lack of experience. Al-Anon is a good place to gain that experience and to learn from the mistakes of others. Why not look up Al-Anon in your area and go along to a few meetings.
You can separate your feelings for your husband from his alcoholism; it is called detaching with love. You can be there for him but not play the game or clear up his mess. In that way he has to take responsibility for his own behaviour while you can maintain your health and sanity.
An alcoholic will always find a reason to drink and any convenient excuse will do. That said, it is possible that your husband does have deep psychological scars as a result of his war experience and that he needs professional help. Unless he is willing to seek the necessary help you may be better off leaving. The most important people in this scenario are your children and you need to protect them from harm.
Talk to your husband one more time when he is sober and find out if he is prepared to face up to his problem.
Do what's best for you and the kids.
I also had ptsd but not related to war and it triggered my addictions. I went through an outpatient treatment program and was cured of my ptsd through a process called emdr therapy.
I can't tell you what to do but I will tell you that when my wife left me, that was all the motivation I needed to get help. That was 9 years ago. Today, I am happier now then I have ever been.
You need alot of support for your self and alanon is a great place to fin that support. You can google meetings in your area.
God Bless