Are you still going to sell your house and get an RV?

Seems my job is in serious jeopardy thanks to me the past few days. So, yea, the RV is closer to reality than it was a week ago.

How is the job related? Its not out of necessity? The husband works doesn't he?

I've always wanted to live in an RV and travel the country. I'd do it if I wasn't anchored in Chicago with two kids.

Welcome back, Anna! I don't think there is any one of us here who has not done something that we are later ashamed of...that's a big part of why we're here, isn't it? Kudos to you for making a decision to live a different life, but trust that no one here is in the position to judge you or your behavior. Sweetie, I could tell you stories that would make your toes curl in disgust!

Glad to have you back in the fold...and remember that you NEVER WALK ALONE! We're right beside you to support and love you on your new journey.

Peace to you! ~Laura

Anna-
Been there done that. You'll find (I pray) that it takes what it takes.. The great thing about the web is it is hard to abuse someone that is virtual.
Keep coming back, we need you...
Hugs,
Dennis

Husband is not working. We absolutely depend on my income. I didn't show up today and didn't answer any pages all weekend. I answered a few incoming calls when I was too shitfaced to even speak. Secret's out for sure now. I am terrified of going in to work tomorrow. My behavior shot all the way up to the VP's in the company. I really fucked it up this time.

Anyway, I think an RV would be a blast. First things first, I need to stay sober.

Thank you, Laura. That means a lot to me. xo

You don't have to earn anyone's respect back here.

I couldn't stay sober for the job, friends, family. I got sober for me. I hope you get and stay sober because you want to be.

Glad2 said it quite nicely. You don't need to earn anyone's respect......just start respecting yourself, and reclaim your life for YOU.

As far as the job, sometimes you just have to let the chips fall where they will and call it your new starting point. Go in tomorrow and make the best of it - maybe it will turn out better than you think it will.

Regardless, stick to your plan for working out your sobriety.

ditto to glad & dipster Olive and I'm sorry but I think "I really fucked it up this time" might be a good thing. You always said there were no consequences, you never had hangovers and you didn't think you hit bottom hard enough, maybe this is it.

How many times have you made an ass of yourself and came back to apologize once you sobered up? Feels shitty doesn't it? We still love ya and just like dipster said, you don't have to earn my respect, respect yourself love. That's what counts!

I hope this is it for you, I truly do. Cause you're starting to sound like someone else on here who's been trapped in this vicious cycle for a few years. Act like an ass, "woe is me", cuss everyone out, apologize, repeat.

Be honest with your employers if you think they already know, show them that you're getting help. Action speaks way louder than words.

As always, I'm rootin for ya Anna. I'm in your corner, now get back in there and kick some ass!! :)

If the cat is out of the bag so to speak at work you might check with human resources to see if the company will send you off to re-hab..if you think you may already be on your way out it would hurt to find out. We all do wish you well on this journey. hugs...mary "poobear" poppins

would NOT hurt..tough typing on my netbook...

G'Day Anna.

I would like to have a dollar for every time I have said I am Disgusted with myself after drinking that Shame Guilt and remorse feels like shit. and also a dollar for every-time someone else has said I am totally disgusted in you and want nothing more to do with you. I would be a rich man. The good news is I haven't heard that in almost 20 years since I have been in recovery.

But I don't think anyone could hate an alcoholic as much as they hate themselves.This is the insanity of this disease doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result or doing the same thing over and over again knowing what the result will be and still doing it. Insane

I think we start to be returned back to sanity when we stop believing the lies this disease tells us. Like next time it will be different ,different all right a whole lot worse.

The time I lost from work was amazing I would have 2/3 days of work after a drunk because I couldn't remember what I had said or done .And there were times I would go into work and find out I had done nothing.

Dust yourself of grab holed of that first step with both hands a don't let go.

Remember it's a Day at a time or a minute at a time Take the action plan you have outlined and take the action.Put your sobriety first because without that you may not need the rest.

My prayers are with you God Bless...

Lionel

Gosh Anna, please go to Human Resources at your job and ask for help. Hiding it all will only increase your inability to keep your job.

You need help. In house rehab will help. Please do it. NOW. No more excuses. Just do it.
We love and support you. You will be the leader of the pack even in rehab!!!!! :-)

There are laws that protect you at this time. However, they will cease to exist if you don't take advantage of them now. Later is too late.

Please go get help...luv, alice

sounds like your ready for step 3 woot! gl with the job hope it works out, i had to live in an rv for 6 months its kinda freeing to have nothing lol

Glad is right. I sure have never lost respect for you. When I got to "can't stand me", that's when I knew real change had to start. I knew I had sacrificed my dignity, self respect, integrity, faith, love for myself and had compromised my love for others and all sorts of responsibilities.

I wanted Julie back. I knew she was still in there somewhere.

Listen to poobear too... I know corporations have their own policies but alcoholism is an illness and the law is on your side as far as termination.