Welcome aboard!!! This site has really helped me out. I really like using the journal. It helps a lot with stress and frustration. Just think about how much your grandson needs you and how much better you're feeling. That is what I have to do. My granddaughter isn't allowed to spend the night with me because I had a drink one night after she went to bed.
Have you tried asking your sister not to drink around you?

yes and she won't but being around her actually mass me crave it

I have been to many AA meetings but have never heard or seen any inappropriate language or actions at any of them. Of course, that doesn't mean it don't happen, but I have never seen it.

I remember I use to make tons of excuses to not attend meetings. I use to tell my wife I was going to a meeting, and sit in my car in the parking lot because I didn't have the courage to go inside. Eventually, I got out of my car, walked across the parking lot, Stood in front of the door that had the sign on it which read, "AA meeting inside" . For about 5 minutes, my heart was pounding! I did not know what to expect but I went through that door and it was the best decision I ever made!

That was over 8 years ago! Today, I live my life by the 12 steps and I have never been happier!

Good luck on your road to recovery, and may God help you along the way!

God Bless!

@bob, I don't think a special needs child is the same as sitting in a car not going into a meeting. Just saying.

Welcome. I hope you find a meeting you can make. I used to take all three of my little ones to meetings. The women's meetings where the kids were allowed were great. No issues ever. I also used to tell myself that if one of my kids heard an F bomb; it was far better than being around a DRUNK mom. So i went. See if you can find a meeting that allows kids. the "filers" are usually better around kids -- and even if they arent, again, I'd weigh the benefits of a sober caregiver, vs. hearing a few sober drunks swear a bit.

i am here to encourage you,, i have to applaud you for not taking child to a meeting i have heard exactly what you are saying this one person always making a crude remark asking people if they need the hand of AA if you get my point , That said go to a womens meeting maybe or there are good online meetings i know for sure and you tube is one In the Rooms has skype type meetings and they are good too you have to have a good HD webcam they are run very well thanks for sharing keep it up and being a former teacher i have a special place for protecting children,

There are on lie group, Life Ring has one. I heard that there are others. I just use DS it's a good fit for me. I make friends. We share journals. We send messages and hugs to each other.

Catskyn, can you go to a women's AA meeting? surely there aren't as many sailors there.

15 days is great! :) SMART Recovery has a 24/7 chat room... Good people there if you ask me. A good solid set of tools to work with if you take a little time and commit a few things to memory. Yeah I'd definitely recommend SMART Recovery chat... Good recovery there.

Yes Big Book Dave I love Smart recovery. This Lap Top has problems getting Safari or any other download my other ones in the shop and will be out next week and I will do my On Line meeting. Im not making excuses. My Grandson was born addicted to Heroin and has a lot of issues and would be very disruptive to put it lightly . I would love to go to my AA women's meetings

Try a women's meeting, as Jeff suggested, or look for a meeting that has babysitting (I have seen a few). Or could you get a babysitter?