Hi, I have been in and out of this site. I have had panic attacks for the last 30 years also. Anxiety makes me feel dizzy even in the house. I too don't go anywhere anymore apart from my cottage in the Lake District which is only 1 hour in the car. I just about make it there, but if we hit a jam, I feel a panic rising and have to start deep breathing. My husband is fed up as he wants to go on a cruise - we have done 2, but now the very thought gets me sweating. I am holding him back. I have seen a therapist years ago, had anti-dep for 14 years (which did calm it down but not stop it). Just spent £300 on hypnotherapy - very soothing at the time but no long term relief. It's life changing. It's upsetting and debilitating. So I feel for you. G

I'm sorry to hear about your struggles. It is very difficult on a spouse. I feel very badly for my wife, she wants to travel and do "normal" things , but I just can't seem to do it. It's so depressing. A few years ago on our 10th anniversary we went on a trip that was only about 1.5 hours away. I was anxious the whole time and I wanted to go home the whole time but I kept it to myself for her sake.

I always tell her "I don't know why you stick around" because I feel I don't deserve her.

I don't know what to do.

I could've written same as you---if it helps to know you are definitely not alone--believe me, YOU ARE NOT ALONE !!!

I know how you feel

Xanax and Ativan always helped me but they r addictive and controlled

I have both Xanax and Klonopin...i dont abuse them at all, but they dont work well for me either. I wish they did...that would make it easier. Im doing a workbook to help overcome panic and agoraphobia and its starting to help a little. Im getting worried though, next month im supposed to travel 3 hours away for a conference for work. That is going to be a real challange.

Xanax worked for me but klonopin did not. they had me on valium for awhile and it helped but it is highly addictive. taking valium is like taking shots of alcohol 3 times a day. I had to go through detox to get off it. I wonder do they make Xanax or Ativan in extended release version? I bet that would help you. now I don't take any benzo's or anything for anxiety. they were all just way too addictive. had to have a pill to go anywhere, it got ridiculous. now I just have been getting myself used to going out and dealing with how I'm feeling basically getting used to it. your worrying too far ahead. I do that to. this will only make things worse. try getting out a lil bit at a time and work up to getting 3 hrs away before next month. keep us updated

when I say I understand, I mean I ABSOLUTELY UNDERSTAND. Maybe this group can help- I am hopeful.......anyone comment- please

I've been panicking unless I was with my parents for the last six or so months. Sometimes it really feels like my friends are disappointed in me because I can't go to parties or the mall with them anymore without having a panic attack. I feel your pain, and I want to tell you that it gets better! I've never been particularly religious but my parents are, and my panic attacks got me desperate enough to start praying and using all the little tidbits of religion I learned when I was little. ITS WORKING. I also went for a workshop called 'Theta Healing' it helped a lot, google it maybe, it's fairly popular. best of luck xx

Just an update on me. I'm doing great on my day to day life. Im having very little anxiety during my 11 mile drive to work, even while being in traffic almost daily.

My biggest concern is i feel like i've given up hope on ever changing and being "normal". I very jeaslous of my friends and family that are constantly traveling for leisure and business without a care in the world. I am not a jealous person, so this troubles me.

I'm tired of beating myself up for the way i feel. This is me. This is who i am. I need to accept it i guess.

What do you think?