Agoraphobia & Social Anxiety Support Group
Agoraphobia is an anxiety disorder, often precipitated by the fear of having a panic attack in a setting from which there is no easy means of escape. As a result, sufferers of agoraphobia may avoid public and/or unfamiliar places. In severe cases, the sufferer may become confined to their home, experiencing difficulty traveling from this "safe place."
Please excuse my ignorance if this is not considered agoraphobic but I have a constant feeling that people are watching me. Even when I am at home alone, in my head it feels as though there is an invisible audience watching my every move and laughing at me. This causes me to be uncomfortable in my own home. I don’t do silly things like dance or sing or get into positions that would make me look unattractive or “judge-able” so that this phantom audience won’t laugh at me. I know this stems from my childhood and teenage-hood when my mom and school friends would pick on me and laugh at how I acted and carried myself but now it never leaves. I feel like I must always impress an imaginary group of people that watch me all day long. I know that logically this is some form of paranoia but it stops me from going outside or opening blinds or going outside for a walk. I feel that everyone is watching me and all of my actions or moves are stupid and that no matter what I do I look stupid and someone will laugh at me and make fun of me. When I finally do go out in public due to my height and how I look people stare at me constantly. This makes me extremely uncomfortable and solidifies the thought of everyone laughing at me. I try to make myself look as normal as possible to not stand out but it doesn't help. This has discouraged me from going out at all and I feel like the outside world is crushing me & judging my every mood even though I'm alone and around no one.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
agoraphobia is NOT an official dish on my psycho smorgasbord. herstorically speaking, the great indoors frightens me more than all the snakes, spiders and poisonous plants put together. i spent far more of my life alone by a campfire than indoors risking the company of those pervy humans. "agoraphobic behavior" started to plague me during menopause. i currently live on a farm, so i can spend lots of time outdoors without ever leaving home. methinks i'm getting worse. as i typed this post, i found myself nostalgic over the covidic years when i was able to declare the quarter mile to the end of my driveway a proper social distance. keep your mask on the proper side of the property line, human.
1. Help Agreed you should seek help. Let's not say these things are easily cured but addressed. There is medication which can lesson it,
2. Therapy Most programs would probably recommend therapy to address your feelings.
3. Childhood vestiges There are popular people in high school who do little later, and nerdy people doing quite well. Logically, you need to get away from this theory you're bound by some issues in childhood. Personally l was bullied, but largely went beyond that, other than because teachers did nothing, remind people teachers have tremendous benefit programs providing for income and retirement beyond what others make.
Not sure if you're a parent but those who are and complained about their parents do find a little boomerang when comments are made about us. Obviously perceptions can vary.
4. Want to change Probably the most important thing is a willingness and commitment to change, pick a health team you like and follow when they say, and take tough steps which can make you better.