aa Spoken Here Community Group
Fellowship Where you can share your thoughts, feelings, stories and get support to gain and continue sobriety.
Does anyone here have problems feeling their anger or even knowing if they might be angry or not?
I here a lot in AA about people being really angry and having to learn how to control anger and express it in healthier ways etc. My problem seems to be the opposite in that I do not feel anger easily. There are things that I am told it is very unnatural not to feel angry about which I have never felt anger in relation to.
I want to be free of anger and I am aware that it is probably in there somewhere often turned in on myself as depression. I just dont seem to feel it and dont know how therefore to find it and get it out
I have had a lot of therapy and talked about the things it would seem natural to feel angry about but still no anger. I feel safe and am not actively suppressing it and yet it doesnt seem to come. I am much more likely to get angry about some tiny little thing than something significant.
I would be interested to hear about other people's experience of anger being hidden from them and how they dealt with it. Is it best to just leave it where it is and hope it never surfaces or actively try to find it?
Thanks.
I here a lot in AA about people being really angry and having to learn how to control anger and express it in healthier ways etc. My problem seems to be the opposite in that I do not feel anger easily. There are things that I am told it is very unnatural not to feel angry about which I have never felt anger in relation to.
I want to be free of anger and I am aware that it is probably in there somewhere often turned in on myself as depression. I just dont seem to feel it and dont know how therefore to find it and get it out
I have had a lot of therapy and talked about the things it would seem natural to feel angry about but still no anger. I feel safe and am not actively suppressing it and yet it doesnt seem to come. I am much more likely to get angry about some tiny little thing than something significant.
I would be interested to hear about other people's experience of anger being hidden from them and how they dealt with it. Is it best to just leave it where it is and hope it never surfaces or actively try to find it?
Thanks.
It was the little things that drove me to distraction.
I believe that getting upset over little things is a way of expressing anger about really big stuff that is suppressed or glossed over. Some times we think we have dealt with the big issues but really we have just kind of said oh well without working through the grief or anger.
My former spouse was physically and emotionally abused by her father was aware and said I have moved past, but when push came to shove and something came up that sub consciously brought up the memories she did not deal well. She never really dealt with it worked through it and admitted how it affected her life as an adult.
Conversely, a friend in AA often says the following which I can relate to a lot :
"The big things I can prepare for and face but what really gets to me, often when I least suspect it, are the crumbs in the bed."