I'm a gardener and I'm okay;
I sleep all night and I plant all day!
I dress in grubby clothing, and hang around with slugs.
Oh, I'm happy in the garden,
With dirt and plants and bugs!

Poetry Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/7399072

Clear indications that you have too much Zucchini:
Your neighbor finds them every morning in his mailbox.
You are eating it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, snacks too.
You have a flute made out of a Zucchini.
The stores pay you to take some off their shelves.
Even the field mice stop eating it.
You till under the Zucchini plants, but still have more today than you had yesterday.
Nightmares about a giant Zucchini wakes you in the night.
Your kids are using it for building blocks.
You spray your zucchini plants with sugar water to attract insects. But, they won't bite.

More 'Lists Humor' to come!

What did the grass say to the lawnmower?
"Just a little off the top, please!"

Barber And Hair Stylist Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/7415117

A magical tractor was driving down the road and it turned into a field.

Magic Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/12693357

Knock, Knock!
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, its cold out here.

Knock-Knock Jokes
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/2834809

A toddler who was found chewing on a slug. After the initial surge of disgust the parent said, "Well, what does it taste like?" "Worms," was the reply.

Bug Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/5079017

What's red and invisible?
No tomatoes.

Miscellaneous Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/8390874

"I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli."
- George Bush, U.S. President, 1990

American Presidents Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/12330570

I like broccoli, either raw or steamed. -Beaumont

My wife's a water sign. I'm an earth sign.
Together we make mud.

-Rodney Dangerfield

More 'Rodney Dangerfield Humor' is on the way!

God made rainy days, so gardeners could get the housework done.

Housekeeping Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/7718642

"What a man needs in gardening is a cast-iron back, with a hinge in it."
-Charles Dudley Warner

Anatomy Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6543159

"Gardening requires lots of water - most of it in the form of perspiration."

-Lou Erickson

Work Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/7824279

"A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for learning how to grow in rows."

-Doug Larson

"What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wisdom
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/3035567

When all the chores are done, the avid gardener will invent new ones.