Tw

It's been really hard lately. My new dog tends to mouth quite a bit and hard as well but I want her to bite harder. Everytime someone hits me I want it to be harder. Everytime I have to tell myself not to get riled up and hit, cut, or otherwise injure myself. I miss that rush. I miss the adrenaline and the endorphins. I miss that excitement. My life has gotten too boring. I need to find something that keeps me excited. Something to look forward to. Something that makes me happy. There's no thrill. I know I should be happy but it's difficult when I wake up, go to work, come home, take the dogs out then watch whatever is on TV then go to bed and rinse and repeat. I don't know maybe I should just be happy with where I am but it still feels like something is missing in my life.