Trying to Relax
Well, here I am again. Just sipping a cup of hot tea with milk and honey, trying to relax. All this self improvement and healing is a little exhausting because I really have to focus on how to react to everything. I'm so used to not thinking about my next reaction, not really caring if I hurt others around me. But now I have to think about how my other half feels, how would my reaction make him react, etc. I have to take into consideration my little ones.
I am definitely going to need daily strength to get by. But I have to dwell on "sobriety" (from anger) in a way so I don't forget how hurtful and destructive I can become on just pure emotion and no logic.
I've even contemplated getting a tattoo on my wrist with a symbol only I would understand. So when I did have moments of anger and I looked down at my wrist, it would be a reminder of the monster I don't want to be.
I am definitely going to need daily strength to get by. But I have to dwell on "sobriety" (from anger) in a way so I don't forget how hurtful and destructive I can become on just pure emotion and no logic.
I've even contemplated getting a tattoo on my wrist with a symbol only I would understand. So when I did have moments of anger and I looked down at my wrist, it would be a reminder of the monster I don't want to be.
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