Tonight is a bad night

My mother just went to bed... do I really look so upset all the time that she can't tell anymore? I made her mad forĀ a second, and this thought wouldn't get out of my head.


If I didn't exist, she never would have gotten mad at me. She would never have been worried about me, or feel like she'd failed me. I'm nothing but a source of bad feelings, with a bitter candy coating.



It would be better if I'd never existed.




I actually cried this time... is that a good thing?

Replies

bridgie101
bridgie101

I'll give you a hiding for saying that. :p

I like you. I like the way you talk, and I like the way you think.

I think you have a great future ahead of you. You're just at a stage of life where you're on your quest to save the princess/kill the dragon/find the golden fleece etc - and you're at a point where you're in the valley of despair. In the dark gloomy forest... every day you wake and it's the same.

Once you have completed this level of quest you get to the next bit, which for you might be a job, or marriage, or children. And then that's your next challenge.

Don't ever despair. Don't ever think the world is less with you in it. When you get through this challenge you won't know yourself. So have hope and give yourself time. Be kind to yourself and be kind to your mother. :) She loves you. You are her happiness all rolled up in a little ball. She'd be lost without you.
C.S.Ember
C.S.Ember

Thanks for that.

Can we get to the part of the valley of despair where we find the magical rockslide I can climb out of, or at the very least, a very tall tree I can look out over everything from? Deus ex machina? OOh, or maybe I can ride the dragon to VICTORY!

Riding a dragon to victory sounds like a swell plan. Maybe while I'm at it, I'll burn down the forest. It only seems to get people stuck in it anyway.