the new normal

I have been having the most awful feelings of dread.  It is like there is an elephant sitting on my chest and I cannot breathe.  This is my life now. I just have to find a way to get used to it. I feel like I am in a dark tunnel and I keep wondering how it can be 110 if the sun is not out.  I just want to get back into my bed and stay there.  Remi's suture site looks red and oozy...is that a word?  I am taking her back to the vet this afternoon. 


Last night I jumped on facebook intending to send a friend a message.  The news feed popped up and it was Steve, with his new girlfriend, at an A's game.   I'm struggling to buy groceries and he can afford to take a date to a ball game and buy expensive drinks.  Why didn't I just keep my head down?  I had a home and a washing machine and Remi had a yard.  Now I have darkness and tears.

Replies

TGrove
TGrove

Baby steps! You'll be better off. Just give it a little time.
bonusjack
bonusjack

There is a big advantage to keeping a journal. Go back and read yours, to remind yourself why you left. You will get past the grief, one day at a time.
AnxietyFreak40
AnxietyFreak40

Yes, I do that often. Thank you
LittleSadie
LittleSadie

Never keep your head down. Keep your head up, girlfriend. Screw that guy. I remember how miserable you were when you were with him. Delete him from your Facebook Move on. Connect with your inner self. And I know you have some friends, you've written about them. They seem like good people. Don't stop hanging out with them. It Will keep you feeling normal.