Small victories

Celebrating the small victories is the most important thing in obtaining and maintaining sobriety, at least they are in my opinion. I've been having a hard week.. well, in all honesty, it's been a hard past 7 months, but this week I have been under an immense amount of stress and my body has been suffering because of it. I walked into my kitchen, grabbed a mango growers and decided to leave it to fate. If it was screw off, I'll drink it. If it's a pop off, I wont. I had absolutely no clue which it was going to be, but I was pretty sure it was a pop off.... It wasn't. I unscrewed it, smelled it, brought it to my lips, and stopped. I wanted more than anything to drink it... but I stopped. I lingered in my kitchen for a few minutes, holding this open bottle just looking at it, thinking, contemplating... I refused to let this disease control me. I walked over to the sink and dumped out the entire bottle. I felt a moment of release, it was a small victory, I had left it to fate...then told fate to go screw itself! I am in charge of my own destiny and who I am. I am strong, and I will not be conquered by alcoholism, I will conquer this disease. I will conquer alcoholism.