Session 3

It's been about a week since, so the details are a little less clear. I brought up feeling reactive and on edge, because I know these are Trauma reactions. I also know my past trauma has been resurfacing and I felt it time to address that with her. I only mentioned the first incident; I talked about feeling shame and guilt as an adult that I never felt before. Even with the work I do, to teach kids it isn't their fault, I still blame myself. How backwards is that? 

We talked about the human tendency to want to control what happens to us. To change the perspective of what happened is normal; I'm just trying to take control of what happened to me. Trying to pretend I could control what happened that night, like I could have prevented it. 

Prior to talking about this I updated her from the past sessions. My husband and I were intimate for the first time since (foreplay, no sex) and have been a couple times now. My anxiety resurfaces around the idea of sex, but we'll get there.