SEEING THE THERAPIST
THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO COMMENTED ON MY JOURNAL. I KNOW THAT POSITIVE ENERGY WILL COME TO ME FROM ALL MY SOTH. AS MY THERAPIST WOULD SAY "THIS IS ONE CLUB WE NEVER WANTED TO BE IN." SHE ALSO KNOWS.HER SON WAS KILLED IN A CAR ACCIDENT 12 YEARS AGO. I DIDN'T KNOW THIS WHEN I CALLED HER. SHE IS VERY OPEN WITH HER OWN EXPERIENCE AND VERY REALISTIC. I THINK SHE IS GOOD FOR ME.
I SEE HER ONCE A WEEK RIGHT NOW. MY NIECE, MY SISTERS DAUGHTER, IS GETTING MARRIED ON OCTOBER 19TH. MELISSA AND JACKIE WERE VERY CLOSE, THEY GREW UP TOGETHER, SHE WAS DEVASTATED. SHE STOPPED TALKING ABOUT HER, ONLY TALKS WHEN I BRING HER UP. SHE WONT GO TO THE CEMETERY AND REFUSED TO MARRY IN CHURCH, SHE IS HAVING JACKIES PICTURE PUT IN A SMALL FRAME AND HAVING IT WRAPPED AROUND HER FLOWERS SHES CARRYING DOWN THE AISLE.
ALREADY I AM PANICKING. IT IS SO BITTERSWEET FOR ALL MY FAMILY, ESPECIALLY ME, & MY SON. i DON'T WANT TO BREAK DOWN. I DONT WANT MY NIECE SEEING ME CRYING. MY THERAPIST AND PSYCHIATRIST WANT ME TO START TAKING MY AFTERNOON DOSE OF KLONIPIN TO HELP ME GET THROUGH THIS. ANY SUGGESTIONS WOULD BE WELCOMED. I LOVE YOU ALL AND WISH THAT WE LIVED CLOSER TO EACH OTHER, IT WOULD BE NICE TO BE TOGETHER SOMETIMES.
XXXXXXX OOOOOOgAIL
I SEE HER ONCE A WEEK RIGHT NOW. MY NIECE, MY SISTERS DAUGHTER, IS GETTING MARRIED ON OCTOBER 19TH. MELISSA AND JACKIE WERE VERY CLOSE, THEY GREW UP TOGETHER, SHE WAS DEVASTATED. SHE STOPPED TALKING ABOUT HER, ONLY TALKS WHEN I BRING HER UP. SHE WONT GO TO THE CEMETERY AND REFUSED TO MARRY IN CHURCH, SHE IS HAVING JACKIES PICTURE PUT IN A SMALL FRAME AND HAVING IT WRAPPED AROUND HER FLOWERS SHES CARRYING DOWN THE AISLE.
ALREADY I AM PANICKING. IT IS SO BITTERSWEET FOR ALL MY FAMILY, ESPECIALLY ME, & MY SON. i DON'T WANT TO BREAK DOWN. I DONT WANT MY NIECE SEEING ME CRYING. MY THERAPIST AND PSYCHIATRIST WANT ME TO START TAKING MY AFTERNOON DOSE OF KLONIPIN TO HELP ME GET THROUGH THIS. ANY SUGGESTIONS WOULD BE WELCOMED. I LOVE YOU ALL AND WISH THAT WE LIVED CLOSER TO EACH OTHER, IT WOULD BE NICE TO BE TOGETHER SOMETIMES.
XXXXXXX OOOOOOgAIL
Replies
Yes I agree. Klonipin is a longer acting drug with a longer half life than Xanax but it has the same effect. I think you will need some medication to help you through this and I think you should expect a tidal wave of misery after it is done, but this is what Jackie would have wanted you to do, she will be there for you. It\'s sad this young woman has turned against God because of this horrific loss. He is our safety, merciful and comforting. It is not God who causes these things, it is the free choice (in an extremely compromised mental state) of the individual. Crime, murder, illness, all of the things that take our loved ones from us, are not punishment from God. They are the result of free will and that free will extends to all of creation, including the weather. I\'m certain God sees her heart and understands.
what ever you do,,, remember you have soths standing with you,, praying for you... sending you good thoughts to get you through.... love ya!
The anticipation is often worse than the actual event. I believe you will be fine Gail. You will enjoy your family and the happiness of the moment and yes there will be a part of you that will yearn for Jackie, that can never change, it\'s the new normal.
As Nora said you are in our thoughts and we are standing with you.
Big Big Hugs,
Terry
Gail, if you cry, you cry. Tell others you are crying with joy for your niece\'s wedding. And if medication will help a bit, in my opinion that\'s fine too. The most important thing is to share your niece\'s day. Love and gentle hugs, Linda