Regrets...

I thought I would be okay to drink on saturday night at my friend's birthday party... That was a mistake. I only stopped drinking because my friends quite literally dragged me out of the bar... I set myself so far back, and I am so devastated... I just want to go out and be a stupid 20 year old.. I want to go get drunk and party... I want to tell my morals and values to fu*k off and I just want to go out and have fun... and that scares me... I'm not the girl that gets drunk in a bar or parties... I'm not the girl that sleeps around that has no regard for her own life....but that's the girl that I want to be... I need to sober up, but I want to party... I want to be stupid...just a few times in my life, I just want to be stupid...