Our Little Fighter Just Couldn't Make It :(
I am so sad right now. We had our appointment this AM. Our baby no longer has a heartbeat :(
It was crushing to hear this. And the previous appointments weren't really even enough preparation because there really is no way to prepare to hear this news.
I thought I had mentally prepared myself. But there really is no such thing.
I burst out crying and insisted that someone else come in to double check. They were very compassionate and brought someone else in and she too confirmed no heartbeat :(
There are not words for what this feels like. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. This is not how New Year's Eve is supposed to be.
My husband held me while we waited for the 2nd person to come in to do another ultrasound. We are so sad. It is so sad to see your baby's heart beating one week and then the next week to hear it has stopped.
This is not how this New Year's was supposed to be for us. I am sitting here in my office....the room that is supposed to be the baby's room. The baby I have been trying to have for over 3 years. And this is just so painful.
I am scheduled to have a D&C on Friday. I don't want to go through this naturally. Since this is my third loss, I want to have genetic testing done and maybe even find out the baby's gender.
I am broken to pieces right now. But I wanted to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all the prayers, hugs, kind thoughts and words. It means the world to have this support. This is such a tragic moment for my husband and me. And to have had so many of you rooting for us has really touched my heart. And I know that if a miracle was possible...it surely would have happened with such life force in prayers and good thoughts.
I know we will pick up the pieces...again....but right now it feels too much to bear.
I just have to trust that I will cope and heal.
It was crushing to hear this. And the previous appointments weren't really even enough preparation because there really is no way to prepare to hear this news.
I thought I had mentally prepared myself. But there really is no such thing.
I burst out crying and insisted that someone else come in to double check. They were very compassionate and brought someone else in and she too confirmed no heartbeat :(
There are not words for what this feels like. I feel like my heart has been ripped out of my chest. This is not how New Year's Eve is supposed to be.
My husband held me while we waited for the 2nd person to come in to do another ultrasound. We are so sad. It is so sad to see your baby's heart beating one week and then the next week to hear it has stopped.
This is not how this New Year's was supposed to be for us. I am sitting here in my office....the room that is supposed to be the baby's room. The baby I have been trying to have for over 3 years. And this is just so painful.
I am scheduled to have a D&C on Friday. I don't want to go through this naturally. Since this is my third loss, I want to have genetic testing done and maybe even find out the baby's gender.
I am broken to pieces right now. But I wanted to thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all the prayers, hugs, kind thoughts and words. It means the world to have this support. This is such a tragic moment for my husband and me. And to have had so many of you rooting for us has really touched my heart. And I know that if a miracle was possible...it surely would have happened with such life force in prayers and good thoughts.
I know we will pick up the pieces...again....but right now it feels too much to bear.
I just have to trust that I will cope and heal.
Replies
I am so sorry. I understand your pain. I know that those words take a part of your heart away, You are so strong and if you need to talk then I am here. Dont feel alone - we are all here for you. Im praying for your strength and comfort during this time.
I\'m so very sorry for your loss!! I have had two miscarriages myself & can understand the devastating loss. I\'m sending prayers your way! I do know that when they finally told me what was causing the problem, I did feel so much relief, not because I had something else wrong, but because it was treatable. I pray they find the cause of your miscarriages & hopefully it will turn out to be something easy to treat. May God Bless you!!
Thank you jfv9f0, daniilovely91 and amrouse28. Thank you for the prayers.
Always
I am so so sorry :( I know nothing can make this better or easier. I want you to know what a support and encouragement you have been to me and all the ladies on these boards. We are right here should you need us. Sending lots of prayers and thoughts to you right now.
Thank you jmommy.
I am thinking of you. Hope you can find some peace soon....
I am so incredibly sorry to hear of your loss! I have been away from this website for a little while and just back into it recently and I am sorry I didn\'t know til now. I hope that you are doing alright, and I\'m sending all the prayers and well wishes I have for you.
Thank you so much.