One heck of a week

The party on Saturday was a blast.  Everyone had so much fun and the kids had me laughing all day.  They set up a slip and slide with three tarps I had laying around.  Then they decided to use soap to make it more slippery.  If you all could have seen them going down, covered in suds, and getting soap in their eyes!  I had about six of them spend the night.  My poor son had to work and didn't get here until 10:30 p.m.  He's been really feeling his dad's death lately, as have I.  Sunday was a really bad day for me and I didn't get out of bed until 3:00 p.m.  Gene came to me in a dream and it was so real I could actually feel him holding my hand.  I just didn't want to wake up.  The dream brought me so much peace and I felt so calm.  Monday I didn't make it into work and slept until 1:00.  Then the kids were here for dinner Monday night.  Tuesday I went to grief counseling and told her about my dream and how different my dreams about Gene are then anything else I've ever experienced.  I actually FELT him holding my hand, not just dreaming that he was.  So I'm up, then I'm down.  I feel like a yoyo.  Just trying to get through this grief is exhausting.