Officially 1 week sober
January 1st, 2013, I decided it was time to change my life. I decided to be sober. I'm starting off with my goal as 2 months, then 4, 6, and a year... My last drink, if I remember correctly, was December 6, 2011 when i celebrated my birthday. But at the time, I hadn't decided to be sober...I had every intention of drinking throughout the holidays..partying after exams.. but i got sick, then the depression sunk in and i never drink when im depressed. never. not anymore. But, I decided no more "exceptions", no more trying to get around it.. I am an alcoholic, I have been sober 1 week, and it has been fucking hard. So much has happened.. and all i can think about is alcohol, I almost walked into the pub by my bank today.. I could have.. I almost walked in and ordered a drink... but i didn't. I want to stay sober. A couple months at a time to start..then six months following consecutively.. I set a goal before, sober for a year, it was so hard to look so far ahead and not praise myself intermittently... not feel accomplished in the least bit... I told myself, sober for 1 year, and I did it.. I became sober at midnight, january 1st 2010... and january 1st 2011, right at the stroke of midnight.. i drank.. in fact, i got wasted. and i didnt feel accomplished.. I didn't feel i had done something, i felt like all the struggling was for nothing.. because in the end, i made a dixi cup of some alcoholic fruit juice drink, and at the stroke of midnight i kissed my bf and drank it down.. and i did shots and continued drinking.. it was all for nothing. So now.. now that i have the support i need, from my DS friends, my friends around me, and my party-girl girlfriend who's going sober as well.. and her daughter..my future step daughter... I finally feel like i can do this.. and i can stay sober, for good. When i think about drinking, i'm going to think about Jess, what she's doing for me, and i'm going to think about her daughter, and our life together, and I'm going to stay strong. Today I have been sober 1 week, and it has been fucking hard. But it is worth it.
Replies
Jess has been sober 4 days today as well, I\'m so proud of her
(`v)
`..Jessyka
AWESOMEST........ WHOOO - HOOOO I AM SO VERY PROUD OF BOTH OF U I KNOW U BOTH CAN STAY ON THE RIGHT PATH TOGETHER U BOTH R STRONGER THAN U THINK DO IT FOR YOURSELF FIRST & THE REST WILL FOLLOW I WILL BE HERE EVERY STEP OF THIS WALK WITH U BOTH JUST KEEP TAKING THO SMALL BABY STEPS & U WILL BOTH WILL SEE THE LITE AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL PLZ LET JESS KNOW FROM ME THAT THIS IS FOR BOTH OF U, IM SUPPORTING BOTH OF U THRU THIS.............
(((LUV YA,ANGEL)))).
Thank you Angel! You\'re such a sweetheart, i will definitely pass the message along to Jess, thank you from both of us! :) I want to stay sober for good, it\'ll be a struggle but it\'s something i\'m really striving for.
Love you Angel,
Acinorev
*correction-my last drink was December 15th at a friend\'s work christmas party... The next day I woke up sick & was extremely sick for a few weeks & started suffering depression
Hello ((( acinorev and angel butterfly :)))!
Acinorev, you and Jess are doing this \"cold turkey\" out of love and for a smart purpose. I admire your efforts to stop or cut down...and please don\'t fault yourselves because there is a genetic variant of addiction whch causes you have the traits of alcohol dependence. Out of both of my parents I have that dependence as well. Although I\'ve never consumed alcohol or had a situation for recovery, I understand very well what you both experience with the symptoms and signs of withdrawal and tolerance. So if I can fight this so can each of you. I hope and pray for both of you to stay stable and focused daily.
/ * * * * .
/* just sprinkling a little hope for 4 ur success. ~~ *
/ \\ . * * * *
Aelle
Thanks Aelle, we really appreciate the support, it means a lot!! We do both have addiction in our genes, which really does complicate things, but we\'re getting through and staying strong together! Thank you for your good wishes.
Acinorev