New beginning

I feel like now that I am out of the house the real work is going to begin. 

I have so much anger towards him.  Every time I struggle for money or think of how my dog does not have any grass or yard to roll around in it just burns brighter.

I knew they did not want to help me out here at work..especially to give a discount...but I did not realize the depth of the dislike.  They are now going after the manager that rented me the apartment and trying to say that she gave me some kind of a deal and that the rent is too low.  There is not really anything they can do to me since I have signed a year lease and qualified legitimately.  She is another story.  Rumor has it they want their son to be a property manager and my property would be a good starting property since it is not all that big.  She is on vacation with her family in legoland and receiving shitty emails asking why she is doing things the wrong way.  Pretty sure if they are willing to ruin your vacation that they mean to terminate you.  Kristi and I would like to believe that we are wrong but she is usually pretty spot on with her predictions in these matters.  These are the same people that pushed her out of having the regional position and forced her to leave this company.  It took 9 people to do what she did and they still did it badly.  I laugh at their stupidity. 

It's time to start trying to quiet my mind and figure out where I am supposed to go from here.  Although going to San Diego to be near my mom sounds appealing on the surface, the wages seem lower and cost of living even higher.  I also miss AZ and have considered going back there.  I have a year to figure this out....I spent a lot of time sipping my coffee this morning and letting my mind sift through things.  It's only the first week of this; a new learning journey for me.

Last night when I ate I wanted to go out on the patio and smoke really badly...I have no idea why the desire is getting stronger after so many days. Weird.  It's a 162 days since I had a smoke.

I also wanted to add a special note of thanks to all of you that have supported me and encouraged me throughout this whole process.  I could not have made it through without all the love and support and late night life lines you all provided.  I hope I can return the favor at the right time or at least pay it forward.  Love to all!