My wife the narcissist

At any time in my 15 year marriage, I would have been quick to excuse the self-centered nature of my wife. I was always confused at her inability to empathize with anyone. She could recognize undesirable conditions but had difficulty looking at them from someone else's perspective. I always believed my wife's traits were simply challenges for me to overcome with persistent devotion. Surely all couples must face such obstacles in their marriage, right? How naive I have been!
Today my therapist handed me a couple printouts and asked me to read them. She simply waited. What I read in only a few lines accurately portrayed my wife. 
I have always believed I knew what narcissistic was, but never really thought of it in clinical terms before. I wonder how many people here were victims of a narcissist in their marriage?
 
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Narcissistic personality disorder is a condition in which people have an excessive sense of self-importance, and extreme preoccupation with themselves, and a lack of empathy for others.
A person with narcissistic personality disorder may:
•   React to criticism with rage, shame, or humiliation
•   Take advantage of other people to achieve his or her own goals
•   Have excessive feelings of self-importance
•   Exaggerate achievements or talents
•   Be preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, beauty, intelligence, or ideal love
•   Have unreasonable expectations of favorable treatment
•   Need constant attention and admiration
•   Disregard the feelings of others, and have little ability to feel empathy
•   Have obsessive self-interest
•   Pursue mainly selfish goals

My wife does not exhibit all of these traits, but the highlighted characteristics are her to a T. The second text I read was more about me and my role in the relationship with my wife.
Narcissistic Personalities Love to Take Advantage of "Fixers"
Individuals with co-dependent tendencies are prone to fixing others for approval. It is not surprising that narcissists gravitate towards co-dependents, because there is no greater challenge to try to ‘fix’ than an individual who has narcissistic personality disorder.
The co-dependent has great empathy and wishes to make everyone else’s life easier and more functional. This truly does seem altruistic, but the truth is that many co-dependents sort out everyone else’s lives in the attempt to feel safer, emotionally healthily and valued and loveable - rather than facing and working on their own insecurities and life.
The narcissistic personality is non-accountable, and it is of great use to have a partner who not only cleans up the messes, but will also accept the projections of the narcissistic personality’s False Self and still keep handing over narcissistic supply. The co-dependent by focusing on the narcissist rather than themself keeps handing his or her power over and forfeiting personal rights. A person with narcissistic personality disorder has the ability to size up another person’s weaknesses and play on them. The narcissist will not only appeal to get the co-dependent’s empathy, allegiance and loyalty at the beginning stage of the relationship, but also knows that the co-dependents need for approval will allow the narcissistic personality to later devalue the co-dependent and project the narcissist’s unhealed wounds on to him and her and make the co-dependent believe he or she is at fault.
 
Yep, that is me. I need to work on this.