my tubes are getting tied!!!!
and i am so happy! it's funny the feedback i get. all the doctors and nurses and surgeons want to make sure that i realize this is permanent. and there is this recurring thing that i guess they are all trained to say, which is "if someday you meet Mr. Right you won't be able to have children." well, MY Mr. Right wouldn't WANT to have children, thank you very much!
i'm just so glad it's finally happening! i was afraid i wouldn't get approved for the surgery because i'm only 31. the nurse yesterday at my pre-op said "you're too young," and i felt myself bristling. when i told her i have never wanted children, that this is something i have felt for my whole life, she said "what about your boyfriend?"
i hate it when the best response doesn't come until the person is gone. i told her he doesn't want kids either, that he has an 18 year old son already. what i SHOULD have said was "why would i have children just because HE wanted them?"
i know it's in our biology; i know it's why we have sex and sex drives and that my teacher said the meaning of life is to reproduce before you die, if you want to look at it from a biological perspective. but if the thought of carrying around a baby in my belly repulses me, if the prospect of living the next 15 or so years of my life with a young child in tow is seriously depressing, and if i have felt this way my whole life, isn't that biology, too? and god forbid, what if i accidentally got pregnant and decided to keep it, and the child was mentally retarded? i would have a kid for the rest of my life! and you can't lock a kid in the bedroom with a bowl of water and say "be good, don't bark, i'll be back in four hours."
when i was approved for the surgery, my future flashed before my eyes, and i cried. i am making a decision for myself and only for myself. i am freeing myself from the obligation that i should consider having children some day because that is what most people do. i am committing myself to myself, am accepting myself for who i am and standing up for my right to spend the rest of my life as i want to spend it, without the worry of becoming pregnant.
and i'll make one hell of a cool aunt.
i'm just so glad it's finally happening! i was afraid i wouldn't get approved for the surgery because i'm only 31. the nurse yesterday at my pre-op said "you're too young," and i felt myself bristling. when i told her i have never wanted children, that this is something i have felt for my whole life, she said "what about your boyfriend?"
i hate it when the best response doesn't come until the person is gone. i told her he doesn't want kids either, that he has an 18 year old son already. what i SHOULD have said was "why would i have children just because HE wanted them?"
i know it's in our biology; i know it's why we have sex and sex drives and that my teacher said the meaning of life is to reproduce before you die, if you want to look at it from a biological perspective. but if the thought of carrying around a baby in my belly repulses me, if the prospect of living the next 15 or so years of my life with a young child in tow is seriously depressing, and if i have felt this way my whole life, isn't that biology, too? and god forbid, what if i accidentally got pregnant and decided to keep it, and the child was mentally retarded? i would have a kid for the rest of my life! and you can't lock a kid in the bedroom with a bowl of water and say "be good, don't bark, i'll be back in four hours."
when i was approved for the surgery, my future flashed before my eyes, and i cried. i am making a decision for myself and only for myself. i am freeing myself from the obligation that i should consider having children some day because that is what most people do. i am committing myself to myself, am accepting myself for who i am and standing up for my right to spend the rest of my life as i want to spend it, without the worry of becoming pregnant.
and i'll make one hell of a cool aunt.
Replies
how went the surgery? i\'m very impressed --- you have really taken your life back. you will definitely be a terrific aunt. have you decided where you are going to live yet?
the surgery went really quickly. i had a lot of ups and downs but i\'m really glad i did it. and if i get this splendid job up north, portland it is!!!