Moving along
So the bank notified me that my loan had been approved.. So now the only thing standing in my way is me. Planning the new work on my home has kept me occupied for many months. This has been in the works since february, i have been putting it off because of the uncertainties at work. I decided to move forward in faith...
so i meet withthe contractor today to firm things up. I am in no physical state for a construction project, but i fear also this is as good as its going to get for a while. I cycle through good and bad phases and this is a good one, i expect to crash again in a few weeks if my body repeats the cycle it has had for a few years now. So thats an argument for moving forward.
but this loan is for 4 years. The repayments are going to suck up my disposable income for that time, i cant afford any crises, doctors visits, tests and heaven forbid any hospital stays. Plus with cfs, i really dont know if i will still be working 4years from now. Somaybe i shouldnt do this...
But i cant allow myself to give up on life ..completing my house is the one dream i have left, and hopefully the legacy i leave for my so. Should it come to that. So i feel i mus do this.
ah,and my sensitiy to light is becomi g ridiculous. The key thing i hope to achieve with this project is to create a space where my exposure to light is minmized.. A bedroom where i dont wake With my eyes throbbing because of the beautiful morning sunlight ..sounds like heaven right now.
And i'm putting a kitchenette into the master bedroom also ..anothe concession to cfs. my plan was fantastic, an entire floor dedictEd to kitchen, dining and family room, with sweeping patios with stunning ocean views...an entertainers dream. Ah well, that was before cfs, now its too hard to climb the stairs to make a simple meal, so the dream will have to wait, now my bedroom is the centre of my home, so i'm making it fully functional..even thinking of moving the washer into my closet so i really never have to leave my master suite.
see-saw, see-saw. Giving myself 1 more week to make up my mind.. Would be nice to do this though...
so i meet withthe contractor today to firm things up. I am in no physical state for a construction project, but i fear also this is as good as its going to get for a while. I cycle through good and bad phases and this is a good one, i expect to crash again in a few weeks if my body repeats the cycle it has had for a few years now. So thats an argument for moving forward.
but this loan is for 4 years. The repayments are going to suck up my disposable income for that time, i cant afford any crises, doctors visits, tests and heaven forbid any hospital stays. Plus with cfs, i really dont know if i will still be working 4years from now. Somaybe i shouldnt do this...
But i cant allow myself to give up on life ..completing my house is the one dream i have left, and hopefully the legacy i leave for my so. Should it come to that. So i feel i mus do this.
ah,and my sensitiy to light is becomi g ridiculous. The key thing i hope to achieve with this project is to create a space where my exposure to light is minmized.. A bedroom where i dont wake With my eyes throbbing because of the beautiful morning sunlight ..sounds like heaven right now.
And i'm putting a kitchenette into the master bedroom also ..anothe concession to cfs. my plan was fantastic, an entire floor dedictEd to kitchen, dining and family room, with sweeping patios with stunning ocean views...an entertainers dream. Ah well, that was before cfs, now its too hard to climb the stairs to make a simple meal, so the dream will have to wait, now my bedroom is the centre of my home, so i'm making it fully functional..even thinking of moving the washer into my closet so i really never have to leave my master suite.
see-saw, see-saw. Giving myself 1 more week to make up my mind.. Would be nice to do this though...
Replies
i see this from both sides..........reasons why now is a great time to set up your home in care of your lifestyle to maximize better for you.
i also feel concern cause if you need treatment and care then you need to have some wiggle room to take care of your needs.
i went round and round on this when i made decisions on my home reno.....i kept the work focus on the exterior and the first floor. the second floor got overlooked, emptied out and there it is..............but like any reno i encountered some unexpected costs, had to replace things that we didn\'t even know would come up..........which is realistic and in the moment makes you clench up tight and then figure out a way to let go, make it happen and not go crazy.
somewhere in between it all lies the answer.........you need to be able to have room to care for your health needs for you and for your son.............and the dream of bringing some of these projects to fruition is also important. why do we live if not to fulfill dreams?
it sounds like you have a practical side and a wonderful dreamer inside you.........and that is a wonderful problem to have........!!! i believe in you, know you\'ll weigh it all out and make the best decision............big hugs, take it easy..............you don\'t list Fibro but some of the things you share sound like Fibro symptoms on top of CFS.............take it easy! good night..........xoxo
Just keep going with the project my friend, to have your own place is valuable for many reasons, especially when you have cfs.I lost my house and am at the mercy of the rental market which I try not to think about too much.We have been here for almost 6yrs.However our financial income picture is terrible, so not sure if we would get into another house now.The building market has slowed so the demand for rentals has brought heavy competition.Also a multibillion dollar Casino project from an overseas developer is happening soon so rental demands will become ferocious with the increase of population etc.So it is a very insecure situation to be in.So my friend even if you have to take in students, boarders or anything to help you hold on to your property if you become more ill, please do it.Or an online small business perhaps.I wish you all the best, Love Di