Monday Sept 5th 2011

My sadness this morning is overwhelming.  You would think that after all these years he and his true love(the silver bullet) would not be able to hurt my feelings...but I fall for it time and again.  All the talk yesterday of a nice dinner and romantic evening together...I should have known that what he really meant was that as soon as dinner was over he would pass out on the living room floor.  I know better....so why am I so stupid?  Why do I keep letting this happen?
I think it's just what I deserve.  Who else is going to want an aging wack job like me? I could not go to sleep last night.  I am so tired.  I have to start a new goal and cut down my caffeine.  I think this coffee addiction is getting out of hand.  I finally got up and took another buspar to slow myself down and a couple more ibuprofen to check the aches and pains and crawled back in bed...I guess I finally drifted off sometime past midnight.