March 22
Today would have been my grandmother's birthday. She died in 2012 and nothing has been the same since that day she passed. It's hard without her here, she was the only person who could really understand me and stood by me. She was one of the strongest people I know besides my mom, but that's another story.
I always felt like she was the only person who ever believed in me and helped me work to make something of myself. Since she's passed I feel like I'm stuck in time and just can't move forward. I feel lost and without direction. I don't really know what to do with my life, I tell myself I've got to change things but it seems something always scares me and I just stop.
On another note my anxiety has gotten so bad that I got a letter from my bank where I also have my insurance through, I was so terrified it was a cancellation notice for my insurance I didn't open it right away. I'm finding I'm creating a fearful situation for the stupidest things lately. I'm afraid of just about anything lately and I've always got it in my head that I've done something that is going to have a negative effect on my life.
I don't know how to get past this anymore. I used to be able to shake it off but now it just lingers.
Replies
HI, Very sorry to hear about your Grandmother's would have been Birthday and my thoughts and prayers go out to you. Me lost a dear Aunt back in 2010 and a couple of close friends 2011 and 14 and a close friend of mine for like 20 years about 10 years ago came out of the closet and wanted a sexual relationship which was not going to happen and a few others that turned out to be just users and takers. So i take one day at a time and what will be will be as leave it up to the Man above.
Yes when we worry that much and only think of negative things that will happen it leaves us in a tail spin but you will get better as if you stop worrying over every little thing your mind will relax in turn so will your Anxiety.
TC,
Keep me posted on how your doing if you like.
Gary