lonely tonight but I do build walls not bridges

No one can get over the walls...no one can get thru them and even if they could what is left inside are broken pieces that no one would want anyway.  Sometimes I think I make a friend..I think I can make a small hole in the wall..but there is always that voice in my head whispering..they don't really like you..and when you need them...if you let yourself need them..they will let you down.  How many times have I needed HIM only to find that he was not sober..or worse that he was angry with me.  I hope I can make it through this week.