keeping it together...sort of
Having anxiety again this morning. I have been mostly keeping it together. I took the dog to the vet and she seemed to think she's been eating rotten fruits or veggies in the backyard. Some meds, and 150.00 later and at least it's under control.
things are status quo at the house. He stays in the bay area many nights and when he does come home we don't speak much unless necessary. Something has flipped inside of me and I no longer have panic at the thought of losing him. Instead I am angry and that is getting me through most days.
I am not even sure if I want to stay here until I finish school. Part of me just wants to be done and go home to Arizona. I am still almost two years away from finishing school. I have no one here. I keep finding myself looking at used RV's and tiny Homes.
People at my job are depending on me though and what am I going to just forget school? I am a little over halfway through but I am not sure I could afford to finish without my CA financial aid. I make too much for other types.
I am really chewing on a lot right now. Just don't know what is the right direction to take.
things are status quo at the house. He stays in the bay area many nights and when he does come home we don't speak much unless necessary. Something has flipped inside of me and I no longer have panic at the thought of losing him. Instead I am angry and that is getting me through most days.
I am not even sure if I want to stay here until I finish school. Part of me just wants to be done and go home to Arizona. I am still almost two years away from finishing school. I have no one here. I keep finding myself looking at used RV's and tiny Homes.
People at my job are depending on me though and what am I going to just forget school? I am a little over halfway through but I am not sure I could afford to finish without my CA financial aid. I make too much for other types.
I am really chewing on a lot right now. Just don't know what is the right direction to take.
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