I burned the letter...
Yesterday I finally burned up a 3 page letter I had written to the person I hated the most. It felt good to watch it burn. It has taken me about 2 and a half years to get to this point where I was finally able to let go. But I knew right after I watched it burn that I would be tested...
I got a phone call from my significant other that he has to train this person for a whole week on some power equipment. She won't train with his other associate because her and that person have a bit of a history and they despise each other. So, my fiance is stuck having to do this even though he really wishes he didn't have to.
The old me would have flipped out emotionally. My anger would have spiked and I would probably have spent the whole evening thinking up ways to hurt this person without getting caught and put in jail just for the fact that she was close to my baby.
But this new person that I am, this person that isn't struggling with her anger every day and constantly losing control, reacted totally different. I was actually very logical about it. I told myself, she can try to talk to him, maybe even try to flirt with him, but he will be professional about it. He respects our relationship and he wouldn't do anything to jeopardize it because he loves me too much. And also he has enough respect for himself that he'll just brush off anything if she attempts anything at all. He will come home to his loving, (very cute, might I add), woman, and she will go home to be someone else's sloppy seconds. I have love and she doesn't, which is unfortunate. But when it comes down to it, you make your bed, you lay in it. She made her life that way because of her choices. And my life is this way because of my own choices. I'm happy with the life I have now, and if my happiness makes her miserable, then so be it! But never again will I lower myself to her standards.
I don't hate her anymore and that is a MONUMENTAL accomplishment on my behalf. Thanks to anyone who has believed and supported me! Love and peace! (Now I sound like a hippie! LOL!)
I got a phone call from my significant other that he has to train this person for a whole week on some power equipment. She won't train with his other associate because her and that person have a bit of a history and they despise each other. So, my fiance is stuck having to do this even though he really wishes he didn't have to.
The old me would have flipped out emotionally. My anger would have spiked and I would probably have spent the whole evening thinking up ways to hurt this person without getting caught and put in jail just for the fact that she was close to my baby.
But this new person that I am, this person that isn't struggling with her anger every day and constantly losing control, reacted totally different. I was actually very logical about it. I told myself, she can try to talk to him, maybe even try to flirt with him, but he will be professional about it. He respects our relationship and he wouldn't do anything to jeopardize it because he loves me too much. And also he has enough respect for himself that he'll just brush off anything if she attempts anything at all. He will come home to his loving, (very cute, might I add), woman, and she will go home to be someone else's sloppy seconds. I have love and she doesn't, which is unfortunate. But when it comes down to it, you make your bed, you lay in it. She made her life that way because of her choices. And my life is this way because of my own choices. I'm happy with the life I have now, and if my happiness makes her miserable, then so be it! But never again will I lower myself to her standards.
I don't hate her anymore and that is a MONUMENTAL accomplishment on my behalf. Thanks to anyone who has believed and supported me! Love and peace! (Now I sound like a hippie! LOL!)
Replies