Happy Mother\'s Day

For some of us, today will be bittersweet.  I'm so thankful to have my son, but it's my first Mother's Day without Gene.  He used to take me to the farm every Mother's Day and I'd pick out all the new plants for my garden.  This year I think the garden is going to be a bust.  I'm going to try to get out there today to at least clean up a little, and maybe that will inspire me to do more.   My son wants me to come down to the restaurant today, since he has to work all day and won't be able to be with me.  I don't want to disappoint him, I'm just not sure I'll make it there.  Then there's my mom.  I haven't spoken to her much since Gene's death.  She doesn't really have the compassion to understand what I'm going through.  But then maybe I don't give her enough credit.  Maybe she knows all too well and just doesn't know how to deal with me grieving.  I've thought alot about taking her out with me today, but I don't know if I'm going to make it and I don't want her to be disappointed if I don't go. So, I'll do what I can today one small step at a time.