Funeral Tomorrow

For the past couple weeks I've been helping plan a funeral for my bf's grandpa who past away June 7 from cancer in his lymphnodes. The funeral is tomorrow afternoon and I'm definitely not looking forward to it... It's been really hard on me to keep myself together and not turn to alcohol, especially because that is what everyone else around me has done. It hasn't been the easiest couple weeks and a recurring thought in my head is how much I would enjoy a Mike's Hard Lemonade.. Almost every adult family member/close friend has said they're going to be getting completely smashed after the funeral tomorrow... I'm going to be in quite the position... It's hard for me to see people so upset, I'm a very empathetic person and of course I'm grieving the death of Ludwig as well because I had spent quite a bit of time with him before he passed and was starting to get to know him. I'm not really in a writing mood tonight.. just trying to stay strong and stay sober, for everyone's sake.