Followed my gut
Today I went to the hospital to see the boy that was driving the car when my Marissa was taken. I had hopes of seeing his family, feeling so strongly I needed to see her, I had never met this family. Seen the boy before but on very short occasions. I waited for a few hours, visited him for a while, sat in the waiting room. No one came.My heart is broken into a million pieces for my own loss then I found him in the state he is and the pain for his family is overwhelming. He is like a baby. Moving around like a baby, in a diaper, cannot walk, cannot talk. He even had this innocent child like look in his eyes when he looked at me. I just sobbed and realized that it was Marissa sending me there to let me know she is happy that God took her to heaven rather than live here on earth in the condition he is in. I left flowers and a card and included my number. I want his mother to know I do not blame her son, yes I was very angry that she met him and was surrounding herself with the "wrong" crowd because I believe she would still be here with us if he would have not came in her life. Could there be a meaningful purpose for all of this tragedy? I have to try and believe there is.
I am reading this book Forever with you by Patrick Mathews. It is very comforting. If no one has read it I think you would all enjoy it very much. Thank you all so much for listening and understanding. It is truly one of the only things that help me get through these horrid moments.
I am reading this book Forever with you by Patrick Mathews. It is very comforting. If no one has read it I think you would all enjoy it very much. Thank you all so much for listening and understanding. It is truly one of the only things that help me get through these horrid moments.
Replies
Angie, I can\'t even imagine how difficult that must have been for you. My heart goes out to you. That must have taken so much strength and will, but you followed your heart and you followed your dear Marissa\'s guidance.
You did all that you could do, and the boy\'s mom will reach out to you if she feels the need to do so. This is truly a tragic situation.
I will look into the book you recommended. I\'ve read so many, but that is one that hasn\'t crossed my path. So thank you for suggesting it.
Sending you gentle hugs and peace,
Diane
You did what you could and can now be at peace with it. I am sure Marissa is proud of you. Will have to read that book. Thanks for the recommendation.
That took courage to go and visit. I think you are right. Marissa wanted you to know that she is okay. How sad for the boy and his family. I am sure your flowers and card will bring comfort to the boy\'s parents.
I have to believe that there is a reason why we lost our children. I don\'t like it but I can\'t believe that they died without a purpose.
Thank you for the book recommendation.
Love and tight hugs, Marlene
Good for you for visiting. Really tough thing to do. Kudos -- Laura
What an amazing act of kindness. Thank you for the reading suggestion. I will get the book as helping ourselves is up to each one. Hugs, Kathy
kudos for that visit,, you are awesome!!!! love ya!
That took tremendous courage and I had a sense you might go. The thought and nudge were there for so many reasons I suspect.
The family of the young man will be touched that you visited and that you harbor no ill will as I\'m sure they have been carrying that added sorrow as well.
Finding the strength to do such a thing as you did uses up all the energy reserves and then some. Fill yourself up today as best as you can and way to go in facing something that many might not have been able to.
Loving care,
XO Joanie
You are so brave!