I've been doing so well then all of a sudden today the tears started flowing and my heart aches for Gene. No one will ever love me the way he did, and I him. Just the thought that I'll never have that love again has sent me into a depressive state again. I miss his touch and his kisses and most of all his hugs. The ups and downs of all this are alarming. I've never felt like this before and I don't know how to handle it all. I swear if the real estate market was better I'd just sell the house and move back to New Jersey. But that would be like running away from all the feelings and I know I have to experience them all to get through this with my sanity.