email to ...samaritans again
im having awful feelings that are not even directed anymore
i guess it could be discribed as painfull in the way it drains the life out of me
and motivation
today i found myself back in bed away from it all
but it does not back off
people again are saying do nice things
do what you like to do
but i dont like to do anything
i feel like ive been running into a brick wall
and now i cant run anymore
if i were upset about a single thing in my life id get it
but i just feel so finished about everything
everything i see around me just seems so pointless
that i cant see away back
i cant even say to people how far i see this ,they wont get it
or would just say something stupid
ive never had a self sustaining feeling like this ,,,this bad
as in without clear grief
its like ive given up with everything
.im so glad its night now so i can pass out and not be here anymore
i guess it could be discribed as painfull in the way it drains the life out of me
and motivation
today i found myself back in bed away from it all
but it does not back off
people again are saying do nice things
do what you like to do
but i dont like to do anything
i feel like ive been running into a brick wall
and now i cant run anymore
if i were upset about a single thing in my life id get it
but i just feel so finished about everything
everything i see around me just seems so pointless
that i cant see away back
i cant even say to people how far i see this ,they wont get it
or would just say something stupid
ive never had a self sustaining feeling like this ,,,this bad
as in without clear grief
its like ive given up with everything
.im so glad its night now so i can pass out and not be here anymore
Replies
I hate it when people tell me what to do
to fight depression. Oh, like it\'s THAT easy.
It\'s not. Saying to do things you like when you are
depressed is clear that there is no understanding.
Depression is very misunderstood.
I\'ve been fighting it since I was eight.
The only things that seem to help are time
and effort. Sometimes the effort is very, VERY
small.
When it\'s so bad that I can\'t stay awake for long,
I focus on small things. One small, VERY Small thing.
Like making my bed. Give yourself the smallest task you think
you could handle. What if you made a commitment to write
in your journal everyday?
The thing with depression is that you will likely not
make your bed everyday, or write in your journal everday.
But it helps because you can provide compassion
to YOU. If there is a day you can\'t manage those tasks, then you work
on forgiving yourself and doing it the next day.
I find the best thing is to get right back to something really basic and small.
It helps fight he overwhelmingness of the depression.