December 12, 2016

After undoubtedly the hardest weekend of my life I believe I've began turning a new leaf. It started with an "unofficial" intervention with my friends. I was ashamed of myself, but the look on their faces of how much I hurt them and concerned them is a big part of why I need to be a better me. I've done little and big things today and am proud of myself for taking the first steps. I've started to recognize negative thoughts, negative emotions, negative reactions and done my best to replace them with positivity. I've decided to put yoga back into my fitness plan. Mostly for calming my mind and body. I will continue my weight loss plan and continue to exercise regularly. I've set up my first session with a local men's support group for sexual addictions. I think the support, getting things off my chest, and the Christian atmosphere will all be great things for me. I contacted my insurance network provider to get the process started for counseling for my depression. I am determined to beat this. I'm waiting to hear back from a local office and hoping to start my treatment soon. Even if it's just a few meetings with a counselor and then relying on this free support group i feel like i will be better for it. Today was about finding my inner strengths and overcoming my inner weaknesses. Today was realizing that life still goes on, even when it feels like the end. Pick yourself back up, focus on you, and work, work, work. - Jesse