continued
well im sorry I left such a short sentence and left one wondering. there was so much in our talk I don't even know what to write. when david called I thought he was calling about mom and hr eye situation, but no. I asked him if he got the text about grandma and he actually said, yes I did and you know mom, I really didn't need to get that, I don't need any added stress right now, I am very stressed already. I was speechless, he doesn't have to deal with it my sister and I will have to be the ones helping mom and so on, just keeping him informed. I told him he needs to get a handle on all this stress, and no response. then he asked me a favor as I want to be involved in the wedding. he actually wants me to ask some people if they are spending the night as he is blocking off rooms at the venue and he will have to pay if the rooms aren't used, the wedding isn't until june. I would look like an idiot and I was already pissed off, other nasty stuff had been said so I am just going to say people said most likely not really sure. the absolute worse talk was when I asked him if he had made the "decision" if my b/f and someone who has known him since birth could come and there was silence then he said no. I blew up and asked why, why cant I have my friend there? he said finally that he cant stand her and she is not going to ruin HIS wedding!!!!! I let loose on how disrecptfull he was, how he didn't care about me and my feelings, I will have not one friend at the wedding, how in the world will I explain this? the wedding is 140 people! he wouldn't even see lyn! I am so deeply hurt. I asked if lauras parents had friends going and he said yes then added, you know what mom, laura LIKES her moms friends!!! I don't know what the f has happened to him, he has always been a bit on the annoying and unfeeling side but this goes beyond the pale. I wonder about laura and why she isn't speaking up to him, does she not care either, I am calling her, I don't like this shit at all. david has said he doesn't give a shit about what people have to do to spend 3 hours before the reception, laura wants an evening reception, and the church is at 2. what a horrible attitude, these people have gone out of their way to come to their wedding and he couldn't care less about what they will do. I had mentioned how fortunate he was to be getting such a large annuity check in September, from peters wrongful death, that enabled him to pay for the majority of the wedding and he said to me that is the way it is now mom, in the tone, the brides family doesn't pay and I aid your crazy. he tld me to shut up about his finances they aren't my concern. then he said well you know mom, it is the grooms parents responsibility to pay for the rehearsal dinner and you certainly cant afford it so I have to pay for that too, I said half crying that don't you worry I will pay and by god I will, I said I want to know I contributed, my sister said she would pay for the damn dinner just to show him. I love david but highly dislike and have little respect for him. much more was said.....
Replies
That is truly an awful situation to be in with David. It is maybe worse to be hurt by a \"loved one\" than by a complete stranger. If you were a couple Id suggest couple therapy. Obviously the wedding is stressful for both you and David and thats a great pity. Its really difficult when you have different values about which wedding traditions to honour \"by the book\" and which to improvise according to the current situation. Its a good thing the wedding is still a long way away. I so much hope that you and David will be able to communicate better and make up some of these differences.
*HUGS* I can\'t believe David is treating you like that. He has no respect. If it was a woman they would call him a Bridezilla. Just nit picking everything and taking all the fun out of the ceremony a year before it is done! You don\'t deserve to be treated that way and you don\'t deserve to pay for the dinner. David knows you don\'t have a lot of money and shouldn\'t even have mentioned it. He is getting out of control. See if you can get Laura on your side and confront him about his attitude.
I can understand your red sad face but I hope things get better soon. We are here for you! Hugs
thank you everyone, i need the support! i am going to call laura and hope i can get her when david is not there. i am afraid actually that since they live togheter that she may know about this and has done nothing or worse agrees with david. i am just simply going to ask if she can talk to my son as he has hurt me badly and we just cant talk about these matters, we will see. for the 4th day i have a very bad headache over my right eye and i cant take anything more. maybe it is stress but i also know i need to get my eyes checked. i am tryi ng to look at the positive side of things in life but it is damn hard. if things don\'t change it is going to be a very long year. my parents ruined my wedding with their alcoholism and i don\'t want to be remembered that way with david.....