catching up

I have not written anything in a while.  Between work, school, and getting my mom moved it's been crazy busy.  School is going well.  The semester ends on Dec 12th and I am so looking forward to being done with math.  I registered for my final class in spring and then that's it, I will be done. This has been such a long road that I almost can't believe it's going to be over. I super thankful to have had a boss that lets me change my schedule around for school. 

Finally got mom moved from Tucson to San Diego.  I flew down on a Tuesday so I could be there to help supervise the loaders.  Steve drove my car down on Weds since he had a work thing he couldn't miss Tues.  Thursday we finished loading and then made the drive.  My mom was overrun with mice in that house.  I went to move the water cooler and two mice ran over my shoes.  I admit, I squeaked like a girl.  I'm not afraid of mice but it startled me for sure.  Friday the other guys came to help unload and we started putting things together for her.  We ended up staying an extra day to fix a few things for her and then drove back home on Sunday.  Although we were all exhausted, I have to admit it went pretty smoothly, all things considered.  She is super happy in her new little house.  It really is cute.  It was built in 1925 and has the original floors. 

Steve was amazing for most of this process.  He brought our camping gear so we had inflatable mattresses and sleeping bags to sleep on while there was no furniture.  He didn't complain at all about the long hours of driving (it was 13 hours for him to drive my car down, and then he drove the 26 foot moving truck through the mountains).  He put things together, he fixed things, he made sure the fence was secure for the dog and that all the locks were secure on the new property.  Of course, on Saturday night he got completely blitzed.  He asked me if I was mad and I said I was getting there.  I know better than to do this when he's drunk but I couldn't help myself this time.  Here we are at my mom's and he's all wasted and starts telling me we are DONE! and that he is going to walk home.  Yeah, whatever.  I apologized to my mom but that was about all I could do.  We talked about it a little.  I told her that I know it's not personal and that it's a disease but I still get pretty angry about it.  No matter how drunk he can get, when it counted, he was there and made this difficult move much easier.  I don't know that it's a fair trade off.

It's like he's two different people.  The sober guy is pretty great most of the time.  That other guy?  Not so much. I just put it aside for now.  I'm not rocking the boat til school is done.  He left on a customer fishing trip yesterday, gone until Monday.  I am enjoying having the house to myself.  When I got home the other night he was already there and had all the chores done, and cooked up extra food so I would not have to cook much while he was gone.  He's been overly sweet in his texts lately and he even left a card for me to find when I got home yesterday that said he was lucky to have me in his life.  He hasn't bought me a card for no reason in years.  It was a little odd(but sweet).  Trying to figure out what that's all about but really have no clue.  Could be some kind of apology for the drinking binge at mom's...or more likely worried I will find a new boyfriend while he's out of town.  He did make the comment that I was probably lining up my dates for when he was gone.  I told him I was going to post it on facebook.  I said I was going to say that he was going fishing so I was free and tell any eligible men(there are none) to sign up for their time slot early.  I crack myself up.  I probably would have a few of my friends snorting over that one, but I restrained myself from actually posting it.

I'm still loving my new car and starting to relax a bit about the payment.  It was super nice driving through the desert where there are no radio stations.  Wow, I always thought going through the desert on I10 was boring,,but I8, that was a whole new experience.  Super boring and long!  I told him how great it was to have sirius and music on my phone. He just glared at me and told me he couldn't even get a mexican station out in the desert.  Oops.  I had not even considered that the rental truck only had a radio. 

I have a tooth that has been bothering me and it got worse after we got home.  I went to my dentist and he strangely referred me out to an endodontist that wants 1100.00 to do a root canal.  There is no way I have that kind of money.  Now I have to find somewhere else that is cheaper or end up at one of the HMO clinics that usually butcher you up.  Ugh..always something new to deal with.

Throughout this whole time I have not had any anxiety attacks.  The fog started here this week and I'm still feeling pretty good.  I have been up 5 pounds since before I left to help mom move and it is remaining steady despite my efforts.  It was really hard to eat well on the trip though and I was happy that at least I did not gain anything while we were gone. I know once school is finished I will have more time and can throw in some exercise time.  This has been the longest period with no anxiety I have had since I was diagnosed many years ago.  13? 14?  I can't remember.  I still don't know if it is related to the change in diet, or some other shift within myself that I am not aware of.  Some days, I almost feel like that tough Arizona girl again.  Steve was laughing at me because I was so riled up after I learned that not only did the recreational marijuana thing pass here in CA, but that you would not be required to get a background check to buy ammunition.  Really????  Time to get the hell out of this state.  Looks like Oregon is an open carry state.  It's looking pretty good.  Still not ruling out moving back to AZ, except I heard that they voted out Sheriff Joe and a convicted felon got elected.  How is that even possible?  I didn't think you could run if convicted of a felony?  Weird. 

Time to get my butt in gear.  Work has been busy with two new subdivisions opening and a bunch of staff changes on the property management side.  I have to go out to a job site this morning and get their internet hooked up at the new sales office.  Hopefully the fog will lift soon.