Thank you
Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for your encouragement and support. DH and you, my friends got me through yesterday in much better condition than I would have ever thought possible. I see now that with God's peace, your help and DH's love that we do make it through the tough days. The days that I have been really dreading are Thanksgiving and Christmas since we have absolutely no family - first year for that - how I remember the great times with family at dinner and the fun we had. I now realize I will (and you will too) make it through those days too. The main thing is to think positive thoughts, care about yourself, thank God for your many blessings and stay in the moment. We can choose to let us destroy us or think enough of ourselves to walk with God's care through the day and onto the next and the next. Stay in the present and be grateful. I learned a lot yesterday (even though son refused birthday card - sent through a friend - and says he never wants to have anything to do with me - he has to live with this.) Right now he is so self absorbed and absorbed with his friends, etc, but one day he will realize how much he had and how much he lost. In the mean time, I am not allowing him to win. No more cards, etc, thoughts of him and GC (unfortunately because there is nothing I can do to change that). I may still see atty to make sure we are on the list before Children's Services and GF in taking the kids if it ever comes to that. God bless you all for helping me and caring about me. I want to also be there with each of you. Just so love all of you in this group. Hugs
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Oh this message is timely. My daughter\'s girlfriend who has his baby (they live together) has also started lording it over me - no doubt inspired by the EC whom she is friends with. She came round yesterday taking advantage of the fact that she has a baby I adore and now uses it like a tool just like my EC did - and my husband was away all day so I was alone - she came to read me my rights so to speak all because I posted 3 photos of her baby (my granddaughter) on Facebook which the photographer had sent me. I was wrong to act like a proud Nanna.
With our EC we can never do anything right. Plus they always want to have the power and show us they have it. They are demanding and set the rules which we are to follow. Even then it is never enough. I am trying hard to not let my ES have any power or control by making my own decisions which are right for me. He totally ignores me anyway. So no more begging from me. I just have to stay in fervent prayer and ask God to help me to be strong and make the right choices. I cannot control ES behavior but I can control mine and I refuse to let him all the power or control. I will live the best I can with my DH and make the most of every day (trying not to think of them which of course is easier said than done.) I just wouldn\'t answer the door or the phone if you know it is some one who only wants to hurt you. You and DH need to keep yourselves occupied and having a good time together. Be active in doing something you enjoy. Prayers and hugs