having a hard dayPLUS the big day tomorrow ive been let downso no i have to everything by myselfi would have to cope myself anway BUT i feel so much better if there were someone with me  lots and lots of stresses i feel like im riding a wild horse   



life is very much like riding a wild horse.
i wish it was more like riding an elephant or
something slower and tamer.

what is going on tomorrow? (i guess it\'s today)

you have YOU with you. You are a great
support. you are very competent from
what you\'ve mentioned in your journal.

you\'ve survived some pretty awful
abuses as a child. i think you are
stronger than you know.

well today i went in to shut off mode
i left the house with dread
.but i pretended i was ok
all the work i have done for my own Audio video equipent
has taught me a lot
i came up with better ideas then the pro guy
.i tereated it as if it were my set up
and it was easy
but not with out some stress but far lower then i expected
Tonights presentaion was only 2 people
tomorrow its 5 or so with
i just need to get the video presentaions
in the right order

today was a lot longer than i was told it would be
and they didnt say there would be any presentions
i got there at 11am left at 10pm
tomorrow ive been told to be there at 7am
so ill be up at 6am
ill be finished at 6pm
I sleapt so bad last night

the sound part im fine