feeling /............ alone because i had friendship taken away over a work ishue feeling a bit betrayed    like the friendship was just as long as thing when there way feeling like i have a lot of work to do to be ready for the new job in a strange way i feel in control even thought it all isnt ...because i did it this time. feeling numb ... all outside things are just not working so i had stopped trying with them i feel strangley like one person  i normaly feel like many sides in one place  feel not to worried about tomorrow because i dont care about it  feel forced in to being who i am because anything i do for the outside world is a waste ofeffort i can only be who i am because no one is bothered what i do to please othersits a bad game