thinking about the i's its was the lists of how i feltall the things at the time that i was facingall the feelings  every line started with ithen followed by something horrible about myselfor something painfull so it was just a big list of hurtting and fastened to every line at the startwas i it wasnt she said he did just i and that letter is a repressentation of all that emotionthe confuison of it all just makes me have one reactionand thats hate myself for feeling these things hate is so simple feel so i need to make a list of i'sbut with good things after them  and "if" or even "when " i can belive the nice things in the listsmaybe i wont feel like that