on top of all this i dont know how i feel about being left for a while i had what i thought was the things i needed but it all left me in the strangest way,i saw it coming and it walked out right on que that does not happen to normal people emotionaly i feel no one ever stays with me everyone i cared for walked away at a basic level i feel awful about it .it hurts to spend my whole life and never be loved back it makes every thing just like window dressingno matter what i do to fill things out the center is not there people may say its my fault but they are wrong i just cant make things work even the times i was with someone i was trying harder then others were im just not one of these fucking people who it works for try it from the other side its easy to hate the world like thisor hate everyonebut ive done that before i just hate hurtting all my life .i hate feeling i hate being un loved
Replies
I can relate to this very well, Friend.
Now you are seeing it. You are seeing a pattern.
That is the first step to breaking out of the pattern.
Humans seek patterns. Even ones that hurt like crazy.
I could never date someone like me before. I hated me.
Now, I have someone like me. It feels good. I feel understood.
But, I nearly died getting here.
You don\'t have to hurt all your life, friend. The fact that you don\'t want to is proof that you don\'t have to.
Everything will seem easy compared to this. You just gotta tackle the mountain one step at a time.
The first obstacle right now is your health.
Without that, nothing can get done.
So....Dr. on Monday? Another call?
Tell them you are experiencing naseau, are having trouble keeping food down, and have major back pain.
Tell them you need help or you are gonna lose your job. Try to stress the importance.
Let me know how it goes.
It gets easier the more you do it. Push past the fear slowly and one step at a time.