SAD
I haven't written that much about Hunter lately because there have been changes and I just didn't know where to begin, however I'm writing now because I need your prayers, good thoughts, positive vibes because I have none TODAY!
I saw Hunter last night - the visit was a weird one to say the least...He reminded me so much of his mom in a bad way and the visit did not end on a good note - a disagreement if you will - anyway, the extended family he has been living with has kept me updated weekly - good grades, keeping up with work, etc....he seems ok everytime I see him, however last night he was acting strange - asking me about God vs Satan - the 10 rules of Satanism....he was raised Evangelical Christian so he is definitely questioning.....that's what our disagreement was about.
Anyway, he texted a friend last night and said he wanted to kill himself but couldn't find a gun and he was thinking about drinking bleach and he wanted to be with his mom..a sheriff showed up @ his house because his friend's parents notified them..he was 5150 to Psych hospital where he is getting evaluated, labs.....etc.....the family he is with is operating @ this time with a Caregiver Affadavit signed and notarized by his dad.....so because Hunter lives there the hospital is communicating with them - this just happened last night so the information is limited so far.
I went through this several times with Jennifer - it is gut wrenching, time consuming, and exhausting but she was my daughter and I did it because that's what you do.....Why isn't she here??????
At this point, I have no legal rights - the legal guardianship has been stopped because of one thing or another so we are in limbo as to what is going to be done.....Please no judgement here when I say, I just don't know if I can go down this road with Hunter....I want to be there but to be the primary focal point when I am so grieving everyday for my daughter, I just don't know.....
I'm @ work today (was called @ work by Sue) - barely functioning....going home to go to bed...I can't function and I'm not sure I even want to.....I just feel sick.. I shouldn't have left, not upset ....too late now....Hunter wants to die and join his mom - can't much blame him
I saw Hunter last night - the visit was a weird one to say the least...He reminded me so much of his mom in a bad way and the visit did not end on a good note - a disagreement if you will - anyway, the extended family he has been living with has kept me updated weekly - good grades, keeping up with work, etc....he seems ok everytime I see him, however last night he was acting strange - asking me about God vs Satan - the 10 rules of Satanism....he was raised Evangelical Christian so he is definitely questioning.....that's what our disagreement was about.
Anyway, he texted a friend last night and said he wanted to kill himself but couldn't find a gun and he was thinking about drinking bleach and he wanted to be with his mom..a sheriff showed up @ his house because his friend's parents notified them..he was 5150 to Psych hospital where he is getting evaluated, labs.....etc.....the family he is with is operating @ this time with a Caregiver Affadavit signed and notarized by his dad.....so because Hunter lives there the hospital is communicating with them - this just happened last night so the information is limited so far.
I went through this several times with Jennifer - it is gut wrenching, time consuming, and exhausting but she was my daughter and I did it because that's what you do.....Why isn't she here??????
At this point, I have no legal rights - the legal guardianship has been stopped because of one thing or another so we are in limbo as to what is going to be done.....Please no judgement here when I say, I just don't know if I can go down this road with Hunter....I want to be there but to be the primary focal point when I am so grieving everyday for my daughter, I just don't know.....
I'm @ work today (was called @ work by Sue) - barely functioning....going home to go to bed...I can't function and I'm not sure I even want to.....I just feel sick.. I shouldn't have left, not upset ....too late now....Hunter wants to die and join his mom - can't much blame him
Replies
Vicki, I\'m so sorry about what you are going through. I am hoping that Hunter is doing better and getting the help he needs and that you have the strength to get through this and support him. Hugs, Laura
(((HUGS)))
So do so hard....so so so tragic...so do so frightening...so do do exhausting
You are loved and cherished.