I am upset and extremely triggered right now. She said she is in love with me for some reason.  I don't know why.  No one could love me. I loved her with all my heart and then she got engaged.  She said she's not good enough for anyone but she was more than good enough in my eyes. She was perfect.  I have spent so long trying to think of her as a friend or a sibling but it just doesn't seem possible. I am always waiting for that awesome moment when my phone vibrates from a text she just sent me. Now I know I'm not good enough for her because let's face it who would love a fat, worthless, guy with scars. I don't know where to go from here. I feel lost and hurt. I guess I need to stop wishing for what could have been. It's just so difficult but She's obviously happy with him so who am I to fuck up their happiness. So I'm going to go to sleep so I don't cut.