I hate myself.  Not sure why.  I know I'm fat. I know I'm strange and awkward. I'm ok with both of those things.  Well I'm on a semi diet and I'm working out more but it's more because I know girls don't want fat boyfriends. So since I am ok with my body and personality it must be my emotions. I am beginning to think that my emotions are terrible and maybe I should just turn them off again. I know I can do it. I have done it several times before and for long amounts of time. I guess I finally thought my emotions might be a good thing but now they are simply pissing me off. So many possibilities.  She never takes this long to reply but then again she is chillin with the dude she likes but wants to hate. it's all good though.  I mean yeah dude is into her best friend/crush but that just means she has to work harder. I guess I'm just being a clingy little bitch.