I haven't written in a few days. I find it hard to organize my thoughts and write them down. Its like a whirlwind in my head and I can't seem to grasp any one thought long enough to look at it, think about it and write about it. I just feel overwhelmed with all the thoughts and the emotions that come with them. Am I confused? Why do I have such a hard time speaking about whats going on in my head?        I find it hard to even comment on my friends journals. I read them and I have feelings when I read them but for some reason I can't put those feelings into words and respond to them. My friends deserve my support and I feel I can't even provide that right now. Am I so far into the pit that I have no energy left to give to my friends? Am I that far gone? I think of things to say but nothing comes out. Am I just being too critical of myself thinking that what I have to say means nothing and won't help?             To any of my friends that read this I want you to know that I care very much about you even if I don't show it all the time.          Throughout my life I have always felt that the more friends one has the more time and energy that will be sucked away from you so why have too many friends. Well, with that attitude I don't have a lot of friends and I don't mind that, I truly don't because I do believe what I just said about having too many friends. That being said I value the friends I do have. Sorry to anyone who I may not have shown much caring and/or neglected. I do care. Just having a hard time with life myself these days.