Happy Easter
So, easter did not turn out quite as planned. I have a concrete countertop project that I've been trying to summon the energy to take on for 7 months now. Not a very difficult project probably 2-4 hours for a person in normal health. I figured it would take the better part of 2 days so looked forward to getting started bright and early Friday. Figured that by Sunday I'd be able to go visit family or take my son to a nearby waterfall and then I'd have all of Monday to rest up.
Well .. Friday started off perfectl fine until my sone did somethign totally inconsequential that made me mad and without notice my day was over. Mood changed so abruptly and my body crashed. OK this is crazy, I'm not figuring this out. I did not stay mad for long, it really was not a big deal, certainly nothing to ruin a day over. Tell that to my body. I was weak as a kitten all day not even able to sit upright. So I ended up sleeping through Friday.
Saturday still weak and exhausted, slept through that too.
Woke up Sunday determiend to stop sleeping my life away so I took on the coutnertop project - applying a colored concrete overlay. I enjoyed it immensely although I was in pain the whole time and had to take frequent breaks (you chsould have seen me crawling into bed totally covered in cement, sad .. very sad). The simple project took 2 full days and I have another 2 days of work to do to complete it.
Today I am sore and tired but satisfied that at least I did SOMETHING with the weekend.
PS : Am noticing that I'm sleeping in 3 hr stretches. No matter how tired I am I go out like a light for about 3 hours then I'm awake again, even when my body is too weak to move I just lie in bed with my mind wandering, unable to focus on anything. Had I gotten a full nights sleep last night I think I would have been fine today, but I was awake from 1am and just could not get back to sleep.
Hmmm... this is one heck of a ride.
Well .. Friday started off perfectl fine until my sone did somethign totally inconsequential that made me mad and without notice my day was over. Mood changed so abruptly and my body crashed. OK this is crazy, I'm not figuring this out. I did not stay mad for long, it really was not a big deal, certainly nothing to ruin a day over. Tell that to my body. I was weak as a kitten all day not even able to sit upright. So I ended up sleeping through Friday.
Saturday still weak and exhausted, slept through that too.
Woke up Sunday determiend to stop sleeping my life away so I took on the coutnertop project - applying a colored concrete overlay. I enjoyed it immensely although I was in pain the whole time and had to take frequent breaks (you chsould have seen me crawling into bed totally covered in cement, sad .. very sad). The simple project took 2 full days and I have another 2 days of work to do to complete it.
Today I am sore and tired but satisfied that at least I did SOMETHING with the weekend.
PS : Am noticing that I'm sleeping in 3 hr stretches. No matter how tired I am I go out like a light for about 3 hours then I'm awake again, even when my body is too weak to move I just lie in bed with my mind wandering, unable to focus on anything. Had I gotten a full nights sleep last night I think I would have been fine today, but I was awake from 1am and just could not get back to sleep.
Hmmm... this is one heck of a ride.
Replies
bet your project looks really great.............!!!
try to equate that emotional spike to an adrenalin rush. it hits your body hard and it wipes your energy reserves with a snap of the fingers.......on the inside your body went into high alert, alarms were going off.......rescue teams were racing through your veins.........lots of internal commotion and frantic activity. it doesn\'t have to last long to throw ya into a ditch. When we\'re too happy, get sad, get excited, get crabby...........it all impacts us. We need to remain even keeled, we need steady...........we need to aim for the middle with all aspects of our lives. It took me a long time to get that those spikes in emotions were slamming me just as much as overdoing it physically. I feel like I was slower to get it...........at the time I was focusing my concentration of what I used to be able to do.........and mixed with that was a lot of negative thinking........I was self bullying alot.......I would think loser, failure, and other unkind mean stuff about myself.
It\'s so weird, I would never put up with that in someone else. If I saw someone bully anyone I would say something, but I wasn\'t standing up for me. I was in a cycle of blame, grief, anger........hurt. Like a figure 8 it had me in it\'s grip.........and it still can pull me in. We\'re all a work in progress!
it feels good, it really does to reach a goal, to have those feelings of accomplishment.........sorry that the brief situation with your son depleted/hit you so hard............sometimes it is shocking at the way it works..........I can\'t remember if you have anything you use that helps you sleep. What I use may not be right for you,we\'re all so different. I went off prescription sleep meds and now take something over the counter........but it helps me sleep in longer stretches most of the time. But like the rest of us with these conditions we go through periods with insomnia running things..........arghhh!
You\'re right, it is one heck of a ride...............surprising and ever changing! hugs!