Another day I've made it through. Seems that's all I can do is get through one day at a time.  I ended up running out to my car today because the grief hit me so hard and I couldn't stop crying.  I didn't sleep very well last night.  I kept tossing and turning and just couldn't get comfortable.  Then I heard a cat fight out back and had to get up and let mine in, that was 2 a.m.  Then I was awake again at 4 and finally got up at 6.  I'm really tired tonight.  I saw my family doctor today and she was really concerned about how I was holding up.  She was also Gene's doctor.  We talked for quite some time and I reassured her that I'm doing the best i can.  She seems to think I'm doing well considering I'm back to work and keeping myself busy around the house.  She said she'd like me to get out more and I'm thinking of going to New Jersey at the end of the month to visit with some friends.  That gives me something to look forward to.  We'll see if I make it.