Thursday
Took my meds on time last night, bath around 10:30. Lights out at 11:30 and read until 12:30. I slept okay, despite DH's rough sleeping. He pulled something in his back yesterday and is in massive pain. He says it's better today, but still hurting.
I saw a side of myself in this that I didn't like. Spending every day in pain and exhaustion should be at least helping me to be more merciful when I see someone else (like my husband) in this kind of pain. Sadly, instead I find myself getting irritated. Granted, he's a horrible patient and very vocal about his pain. Still. I'm disappointed in my reaction. OTOH, I stand by this morning's snide comment.
DS1 made a slightly rude comment. He's no more a morning person than me.
DH: "Oh great, I'm in pain and now I get to deal with a child with a 'tude."
Me: "Welcome to my world, love."
It wasn't nice, but I said it without thinking. Hey, at least he gets to leave that world soon. :)
My quest to be nicer today--or more accurately to be less selfish and egocentric--is off to a rather rocky start. I see the doc about migraine prevention in half an hour, so hoping that will help.
Fatigue: 7
Pain: 3
Fog: 5
I saw a side of myself in this that I didn't like. Spending every day in pain and exhaustion should be at least helping me to be more merciful when I see someone else (like my husband) in this kind of pain. Sadly, instead I find myself getting irritated. Granted, he's a horrible patient and very vocal about his pain. Still. I'm disappointed in my reaction. OTOH, I stand by this morning's snide comment.
DS1 made a slightly rude comment. He's no more a morning person than me.
DH: "Oh great, I'm in pain and now I get to deal with a child with a 'tude."
Me: "Welcome to my world, love."
It wasn't nice, but I said it without thinking. Hey, at least he gets to leave that world soon. :)
My quest to be nicer today--or more accurately to be less selfish and egocentric--is off to a rather rocky start. I see the doc about migraine prevention in half an hour, so hoping that will help.
Fatigue: 7
Pain: 3
Fog: 5
Replies
Yeah, it\'s hard, isn\'t it? I think we have some underlying resentment about being ignored and misunderstood and it comes out in snarkiness. Sometimes it\'s hard to say how heartbroken we are and it comes out as irritation instead. Ah, well, onward and upward. Smiles.
It\'s hard to be your shiny perkiest when you\'re in pain, and have been for a long time... I was certainly no joy to be around when my back was crippling me up. And really, that IS where you live everyday, isn\'t it? You weren\'t secretly gleeful that you could say that to DH, were you? No, it just came out. Don\'t be too hard on yourself... hugs
Thanks, y\'all. No, I wasn\'t gleeful. For a moment I hope he might gain an inkling of understanding from it. But I stand by what I\'ve always said to him. \"I hope you never really understand what this is like. No one should have to know what this is like.\"
I have said many times that I would not wish the daily pain I am in on my worst enemy!!!
Amen, sugarbear!
Yeah, don\'t beat yourself up. It just flew out from the back of your mind and he probably doesn\'t even recall it. Just think of all the times you DON\'T say something \"snarky\' when you could would like to. WE all try not to burden others with our pain and hardships, and that is a burden in itself. Sometimes, it just has to find a vent. So big deal. It\'s not as if you pulled a knife on him! Give yourself a break!
Maris-- \"It\'s not like you pulled a knife on him!\" I love your point of view! You\'re right, he probably has forgotten it. Sadly, all he can think of right now is his back/tailbone/etc pain. Poor guy can\'t bend without almost screaming. He\'s at the doc\'s office now.